Editors’ note: For the next few weeks we’ll be critiquing dates on “The Mormon Bachelor.” The folks at MoBach heavily moderate their comments so that everything involves sunshine and rainbows, and we think that is dumb. This is dating, people! Not all of it works or is positive, and we shall address it as such. Your comments and thoughts – uncensored and unedited – are welcome, as always.

Jane Madsen

Al: Flight out from NYC, a very ballsy move, but seriously, that’s a big step forward.
Geoff: I wonder if he remembers from … the application video?

G: More Michael Buble??????? Bloody Canadians.

A: Can you have an unhealthy obsession for the bat mobile and not love batman? I think it’s all a guise.
G: It’s an expression of his inner self. Rick thinks he’s hardcore. Hardcore parkour!

A: Cooking class is a great idea for a date thought. Props to Jane for picking well.
G: Agreed, even if it’s at a Williams Sonoma copy.

A: They look really comfortable together…

A: LOVE the interviews with random people, old women love to gush over budding romances.
G: Yes, these women are clearly experts on character and relationships. Kellie is a wise judge.

A: “OMG, I think he really likes her!” lol, love that we got a solid OMG in there 🙂
G: Mary! MoBach! Allowing the Lord’s name taken in vain on your show? Hypocrisy, thy name is you.

A: Feeding each other salad – that wasn’t awkward. I can’t even feed myself salad, let alone get all that leafiness into someone else’s mouth.
G: I’m avoiding a “That’s what she said” right now.

A: HOLY MOTHER. A first kiss that requires jaw pumping is a pretty solid first kiss. That was some serious kiss eh’? Go Jane.
G: He about ate her face off! Rick must love the power he has over these women. Pretty solid showing from Jane, all around. Even Rick can surprise us, considering I don’t think she’s wildly cute or anything. Personality triumphs over all! Take notes, ladies.

Lisa Whitlock

A: Van Halen!!
G: But not Val Halen. Bloody Glee renditions of Van Halen. Ten dollars says the MoBach producers aren’t even familiar with the original Van Halen song.

A: A hair dresser in Orange County – No WAY!
G: Speaking of which, I need to find my local LDS stylist in the DC area who gives folks the “Mormon discount.” If you know any, let me know!

G: You’ve gotta read the synopsis on this one. Rick basically says two wonderful things: 1) He feels like a teenager with Lisa; 2) He mostly calls Lisa 1.0 some sort of partying tramp as he stresses how much he loves Lisa 2.0. While that’s nice, he refers to this enough times that now I can’t help but view Lisa as what she allegedly was rather than what she is.

A: I love when they explain themselves to random people who don’t care – “I’m the mormon bachelor”
G: That’s “Mormon Bachelor,” Al. It is a title, and one worthy of respect and upper case letters.

A: I feel like I’m watching an episode of Glee.
G: You are. I hate Glee. It’s ruined everything. My sister is a high school choir teacher and now all the kids want to sing songs from Glee, completely misunderstanding that choir actually involves choral songs. UGH.

A: There’s always money in the banana stand…
G: No touching!

G: “I am having a love affair with this ice cream sandwich.”

A: End the date with a high-five, does it get any more classy?
G: Looks like our girl Janna McFerson sponsored this date. Go FHE Book!

G: I love the recap video. More of Rick talking about how Lisa has “changed” and footage of Lisa wandering around in the background.

G: Also, Rick’s favorite part of the date: “Walking around and getting to know one another.” Lisa’s: “The foam pit.”

Verdict:

Al: Jane wins! And how!

Geoff: Yes, that wasn’t just a connection; their minds (and jaws) were locked in symphonic, sensual bliss. Granted, for all we know, Jane was once a partier and such!