Editors’ note: For the next few weeks we’ll be critiquing dates on “The Mormon Bachelor.” The folks at MoBach heavily moderate their comments so that everything involves sunshine and rainbows, and we think that is dumb. This is dating, people! Not all of it works or is positive, and we shall address it as such. Your comments and thoughts – uncensored and unedited – are welcome, as always.

Jamie Robinson

Geoff: It’s going to go WELL.
Al: Santa Monica Pier! santa monica pier.

G: “Fritto Misto” means “stir-fry” in Italian, cause, you know, the Italians are noted for their stir-fry.

G: One minute in and it appears that nothing is really happening. At all.
A: I’m no body language expert, but they hate each other

G: Those Pier rides are clearly pretty popular.
A: Rick gets props for his screaming. Women love men who scream like them.

G: This dancing crap at 2:00 makes for some of the most uncomfortable MoBach viewing I’ve seen. Seriously, I might have nightmares here.
A: She doesn’t want in on this at all.

G: Crocs? CROCS? On a date?
A: The bubble blower girl was a great addition, reminiscent of the kid announcing “This is Rick Buck” on the Aubrey date

G: No goodbye hug footage? That’s as soft porn as this one is going to get and you deny me, MoBach people!
A: But they were hand holding!

G: I got absolutely no feel for Jamie from this date. I chalk it up to poor editing. Had to watch the recap vids to even hear her voice (seriously!).
A: It’s clear Geoff, they hate each other.

Brittany Plothow

G: Alright, my turn for full disclosure. I was in the same ward as Brittany for two years when I was at BYU. She was into esthetics then, and as such, gave me my first and only facial. It’s true! Picture below. She calls me “George Wickham.”
A: She was into ethics? At BYU? Preposterous!

G: Brittany looks super interested in Rick’s comments about BYU basketball.
A: Basketball talk on dates is amazing. I’ve been that guy before, take it from me buck, it’s no place to be

G: This shopping for clothing thing looks familiar…
A: Heaven forbid she not buy all his clothes he selects, she would be so inconsiderate if she didn’t pay for it.

G: Rick + skinny jeans = wanton violation of my temple covenants
A: We’ve got chemistry here, can you feel it?

G: Again with Glee references. Stop it, people!
A: Rick must be a closet glee fan, the outfit on her was a fulfillment of so many a fantasy

G: In reading Rick’s synopsis, apparently he picked the Macy’s part? I hope you have a good answer for this one, Plothow.
A: eek.

G: Sorry, Britt; no connection here and it was pretty apparent.
A: LOL, none at all, the hi five esque goodbyes are a refreshing change from the agressive makeouts though. Can’t have the filet mignon every night, can we?

G: Recap video: How many time has Rick said that his first impression was, “This is the girl from the application video!” They are all girls from the application video, you knob.

Verdict:

Geoff: Let’s call it like it was. Both dates didn’t seem to be the best ones on record. All are punished and no one wins. You can also read Brittany’s synopsis of her date with Rick here.
Al: Lose. Absolutely agree Geoff, where were the screeners on these dates, they gotta pick more flight attendants methinks.