Sunday School Bonanza – Ten-minute Gospel Doctrine preparation

Please subscribe in iTunes, grab the RSS feed and spread the word!

Teacher’s manual

Student manual

- Download "This Week in Mormons" Podcast MP3

Be Mine

Great show this week! Defending the priesthood; opposition to the Paris Temple; why I’m a Mormon Democrat; Holocaust victims baptized (d’oh); Otterson speaks on affinity fraud; MoTab performing in Arizona – and more!

Clicks:

1. Mormon Midrashim
2. Opposition to Paris Temple
3. Why I’m a Mormon Democrat
4. Holocaust victim baptized
5. Otterson on affinity fraud
6. MoTab heads to Jan Brewer country
7. BYU student found dead in Australia
8. Mormonism and the presidency – don’t worry
9. Scriptures for kids!

Subscribe in iTunes or get RSS for your reader here.

Gospel Doctrine teacher’s manual

Student manual

- Download "This Week in Mormons" Podcast MP3

What's Wrong With This Picture?

Prop 8 is struck down by another court. What is the Mormon response?

Using ward lists for politics. McKay Coppins gets it mostly right, save a few fact-checking issues.

The rise of Joanna Brooks continues. She receives a great profile on CNN.

Why are amazing men still single? Don’t ask us. We’re not amazing. But we are single.

New York Mayor Michael Bloomberg hates on the Church for owning KSL, which sells lots of guns to lots of people.

Assorted: The Romanian IMF chief is Mormon and proud, temple updates, a lame dating quiz, and “Mom, I’m Dating a Mormon” starts.

Touch for info:

1. Prop 8 overturned
2. Church response to Prop 8 ruling
3. Joanna Brooks on CNN
4. Bloomberg hates KSL
5. Ward rosters and politics
6. Why amazing men are still single
7. Lame dating quiz
8. Romania’s jowel king
9. Connecticut temple
10. LDS Tech updates

Sunday School Bonanza – Ten-minute Gospel Doctrine prep.

Subscribe in iTunes or use the ol’ RSS

Teacher’s manual

Student manual

- Download "This Week in Mormons" Podcast MP3

We address our alleged criticisms of LDS church leaders. Seeking understand is quite different from railing against Salt Lake.

Elder Marlin K. Jensen has some frank words to share about the state of the Church and how levels of attrition are the highest they’ve been since pioneer days. How is the Church dealing with this? It’s pretty interesting.

A man says the Church stole his paintings

Updates on how the Honor Code at BYU suppresses freedom of religion.

A number of mainstream media stories highlight three great aspects of the Church – garments, tithing, and the nature of the afterlife.

Mitt Romney basically denied the First Vision. Great job, Mitt!

Links:

1. Elder Jensen and dealing with the modern age
2. Tackling tough aspects of Mormon history
3. Response to BYU not supporting religious freedom
4. The Church – art thief
5. McKay explains garments
6. Mormons and tithing
7. GQ takes on tithing
8. Hell for Mormons
9. NYT – Mormon cuisine
10. BYU is the hottest campus in the nation
11. The best BYUSA candidate ever

Sunday School Bonanza – Ten-minute Gospel Doctrine prep.

Subscribe in iTunes or with RSS

Teacher’s manual

Student manual

- Download "This Week in Mormons" Podcast MP3

The Church seems to approach the battle against gay marriage differently in different states. Minnesota is the latest non-Mormon-heavy state to receive nothing more than a letter read over the pulpit. Why a massive undertaking in California but passive resistance in Minnesota for a moral issue?

Political Beat: Mitt’s finances are discloses, the Church apparently owns Burger King, and Mitt’s “surge” in South Carolina mostly consisted of YSA and BYU kids from DC who were bused down (Incidentally, our boy McKay doesn’t even know use the Church’s proper name), Newt’s pastor says Mormons are a cult. Familiar?

The Kansas City Temple gets its open house and dedication dates.

Jimmer Fredette is your 2011 Mormon of the Year. Yay. Rah. Jimmergasm.

Elizabeth Smart is getting married to a cliche Scotsman. Geoff offers his Scottish insider insights.

Have you seen the “Dear John” section of DearElder.com? Hilarious.

Tidbits: Seminary turns 100, Deseret Books continues to destroy local businesses, “Joseph Smith” on Facebook, and the Top 10 Mormon films.

Links:

1. Different approaches to preserving the sanctity of marriage
2. YSA bused to SC
3. Jimmer is Mormon of the Year
4. Romney’s tithing
5. KC open house
6. Dear John
7. Elizabeth Smart’s beau
8. Joseph Smith’s Facebook page
9. Newt thinks we’re a cult
10. Seminary turns 100
11. Goodbye, family-owned LDS bookstore
12. Top 10 Mormon Films

Please subscribe in iTunes

Gospel Doctrine teacher’s manual

Student manual

- Download "This Week in Mormons" Podcast MP3

Get Back in France

Stop SOPA now! Listen in for details.

A photo of Mitt Romney possibly leaving mission boundaries sparks controversy… because Geoff started it.

PEW releases a landmark study of Mormons, with some pretty interesting results.

Does BYU curb religious freedom via the Honor Code? The Student Review says yes, and we’re inclined to agree.

Pornography will end because of condoms. You heard it here first. Listen in for details.

Businessweek alleges that the “I’m a Mormon” campaign is really an effort on the Church’s part to elect a Mormon president.

Assorted news: The Paris Temple looks like a strip mall; Jon Heder won’t do sexy; the Daily Universe ceases to be daily; beware of giving your wife your Facebook password.

Links:

1. PEWage
1. Actual PEW text
2. Exciting infographics!
2. The end of porn
3. Businessweek and Mormons
4. Let your husband read your Facebook
5. Daily Universe goes weekly
6. Jon Heder is clean
7. How the Honor Code restricts religious freedom
8. The Paris Temple letdown

Cloisters!

As always, we encourage you to subscribe in iTunes. iTunes-a-phobes or stream-o-philes can YouTube it below.

Gospel Doctrine Teacher’s Manual

Student Manual

Maxwell Institute article

- Download "This Week in Mormons" Podcast MP3

Pure, Unadulterated Talent

Mitt Romney is an anchor baby. Can you believe the scandal? His MEXICAN family?? We talk about other Huntsman-Romney stuff, notably the Church’s alleged sabotage of the Huntsman campaign.

Online dating – endorsed by the Brethren or discouraged? Answers!

Some bored Mormon moms start a Mormon mythbusting podcast.

Julie Beck gets into podcasting. This should be a model for other Church leaders.

Also, some joyous news from the LEGO/modeling front. Listen in for details.

Other news: Church plots for sale in Harlem, SLC is the gayest city in America, LDS.org calendar gets updated.

Clickage:

1. I’m afraid of Mormons, but still better than a Muslim
2. Mormon political roundup
1. Would Salt Lake influence the White House?
2. Romney is an anchor baby
3. Mitt embraces Mormonism in South Carolina
4. Is the Church fixing the Huntsman campaign?
3. Julie Beck gets on the horn
4. Salt Lake is uber gay
5. Deserted News
6. Online dating
7. LDS land in Harlem
8. Mormon Mythbusters
9. LDS.org calendar updates
10. Build your LEGOs, sir

Visit msnbc.com for breaking news, world news, and news about the economy

- Download "This Week in Mormons" Podcast MP3

TWiM turns 100! Thanks to all of you for helping us reach this milestone. You make it all worthwhile. To celebrate, we pat ourselves on the back and spend the end of the show reading every episode title of This Week in Mormons, ever.

David Archuleta’s mission plans result in a nicely balanced article about LDS missions in the Wall Street Journal.

President Monson is among the most admired religious leaders in the world!

Tuscon hates Mitt Romney. Jon Hunstman is a better Mormon, says they, because he actually likes immigrants.

The top religious stories from Utah in 2011! It’s a big deal.

Other stuff: Explanation on Mormons becoming gods, more on the Mormon Ponzi scheme, old Nauvoo city council minutes.

Touch:

1. John McCain endorsed the wrong Mormon
2. From American Idol to Mormon missionary
3. Top religious stories of 2011
4. Monson is admired
5. Mormons becoming gods
6. Nauvoo city council minutes
7. Mormon Ponziis
8. Mormon Times has TV?
9. Ancient seals!

- Download "This Week in Mormons" Podcast MP3

The year in review, for we as individuals, for the Church, and for the podcast! What are your memories of 2011 and, more importantly, your memories of TWiM? We are the most important. Don’t forget that.

David Archuleta decides to go on a mission! Woo hoo!

Geoff has more beef with Deseret Book. It’s sad. It’s justified.

Changes in YSA wards in terms of size, naming (_YSA Ward), and other issues. What is going on here? Doesn’t this all go against the whole concept of more, smaller, more manageable singles wards?

Advice from LDS single men to the ladies. Really profound stuff.

And a special segment: We’ve decided the Brethren all need blogs and Twitter accounts, but what should these accounts be named? This is where the genius of TWiM comes in.

Links:

1. Advice from single men
2. Eating crow
3. P Diddy quotes L. Tom Perry
4. 2011: The Year Mormonism Went Mainstream
5. Anti-Mormon website from GOP candidate

Better Than "Russ' Fusses"

]]> http://thisweekinmormons.com/2011/12/episode-99-neils-squeals/feed/ 4 http://thisweekinmormons.com/2011/12/the-savior-the-greatest-gift-of-all-2/ http://thisweekinmormons.com/2011/12/the-savior-the-greatest-gift-of-all-2/#comments Thu, 22 Dec 2011 20:42:15 +0000 Geoff http://thisweekinmormons.com/?p=2534

By Geoff Openshaw

Note: Taken from a discourse delivered December 2010

Many of us have pleasant memories of our childhood as we eagerly awaited the arrival of Christmas morning. Presents, wrapped in all manner of deceiving paper and ribbon, slowly took over the area around the tree, leading up to that one exciting morning every year when we were given gifts by family members and loved ones.

And then it was over. 364 more days to go.

The origins of gift giving for Christmas are rooted in the visit of the Three Wise Men, or Magi, as they came from their “country in the east” to honor the newly-born Son of God. Many Christian traditions hold that the wise men arrived twelve days after the birth of the Savior, thus giving us the Twelve Days of Christmas. That day today is known as Epiphany, and is generally celebrated on January 6^th.

Today, sadly, what was originally an ancient attempt to honor the birth of Jesus has been contorted by man; and in our society, the focus during Christmastime turns away from the Lord and towards those worldly pursuits which we are encouraged to repudiate. The greatest gifts are not given by man, however well-intentioned they are. The greatest gift ever given to us comes from our loving Heavenly Father in the form of his Only Begotten Son, Jesus Christ.

Prophesies of Christ

The birth of the Savior was prophesied long before it came to pass. Throughout the Old Testament, the Jews lived the Mosaic Law, and taught that the Messiah would eventually come to save Israel. As the Lord said to Ahaz, “Therefore the Lord himself shall give you a sign; Behold a virgin shall conceive, and bear a son, and shall call his name Immanuel” (Isaiah 7:14). Immanuel translates to God with us, meaning that the Lord will come to save and redeem his people.

Micah offers another prophecy regarding the divinity of Jesus. He says, “But though, Beth-lehem…, though thou be little among the thousands of Judah, yet out of thee shall he come forth unto me that is to be the ruler in Israel; whose goings forth have been from of old, from everlasting” (Micah 5:2). I love this account because of that last phrase – “whose goings forth have been from old, from everlasting.” Few other passages of scripture so perfectly illustrate the eternal nature of Christ’s role. He, along with the Father, created the world in which we now live. He would later come to the world in the flesh to save and redeem man. And He continues to guide the work of eternity today. Christ’s Atonement truly is infinite.

The Nephites were also promised signs of the coming of the Lord. One of these signs came through Samuel, a Lamanite. As he preached to the many wicked Nephites in the years leading up to the birth of Jesus, he promised that as a sign of the Savior’s birth there “…shall be on day and a night and a day, as if it were one day and there was no night…. And behold, there shall a new star arise, such an one as ye never have beheld; and this also shall be a sign unto you” (Helaman 14:4-5).

Can you imagine awaiting the fulfillment of this prophecy? To the faithful, it was surely an auspicious promise, but also one that was received with a sense of anxiety, as the righteous followers of the Lord were persecuted in the period leading up to the time appointed for the Savior’s birth. The non-believers said, “But behold, we know that this is a wicked tradition, which has been handed down unto us by our fathers, to cause us that we should believe in some great and marvelous thing which should come to pass, but not among us, but in a land which is far distant, a land which we know not; therefore they can keep us in ignorance, for we cannot witness with our own eyes that they are true” (Helaman 16:20).

Sometimes just as these people doubted the actuality of the Savior’s birth and mission, we, too, can have a tendency to stop believing that the Lord’s mission is real and applies to each and every one of us. We fail to believe that the star will ever actually shine in the sky. We doubt that He will ever come. In those moments we must follow the counsel of the Savior to “Be not afraid, only believe” (Mark 5:36). Brothers and sisters, the birth of the Savior in Bethlehem really did come to pass. He truly is the Son of God and came here to fulfill the great designs of the Father.

The Birth of the Savior

We are familiar with the basic tenets of the story of the birth of Christ. The Roman Empire controlled Judea and was about to carry out a general taxing and census of the empire. Roman law taxed people where they lived, but it also respected Jewish custom, which required that individuals register in their ancestral homes, which is why Joseph and Mary traveled to Bethlehem (Talmage, Jesus the Christ, p. 91-92).

Mary, of course, was pregnant, though not with Joseph’s child. We have been fortunate through many accounts to learn about the divine nature of Mary, though we tend to speak very little about Joseph. This is, perhaps, because he does not utter even one recorded sentence in the scriptures. But we know he was a righteous man.

Under Jewish law, Joseph had two options when he learned of Mary’s pregnancy: 1) Have Mary tried in public and condemned, possibly resulting in her death; or 2) privately sever his spousal contract with her. Joseph loved Mary and would spare her any embarrassment or pain if he was able. He decided to privately annul their spousal agreement. Only after he had chosen to spare Mary trial, injury, or embarrassment did an angel appear to him and directed him to take Mary as his wife (Talmage, Jesus the Christ, p.84).

In that brief story there lays a potent example of Christlike love and compassion – and from the very man whose son Jesus was not. Only after acting through love and mercy did Joseph receive the witness that his role was much more important than that of any other husband.

We are familiar with the rest of the story in Bethlehem. Jesus was then born in the midst of animals and debris – hardly fitting for the Savior of the World, but perfectly representative of the humility which would define Him throughout his ministry. Even then, in his nascent state, the King of Kings was teaching us.

I find it interesting that the first people to visit the baby Jesus were nearby shepherds. These were no ordinary shepherds. Under Jewish law, the only shepherding allowed near cities and towns was to raise animals for sacrifice. These animals had to be perfect and without blemish. Surely the flocks of these shepherds were meant to be offered up as symbolism for the very baby that now lied in their midst. Jesus is simultaneously referred to as the Lamb of God and the Good Shepherd – the Lamb of God because he offered up the final sacrifice of blood so that we may live, and the Good Shepherd because without His guidance and love, we would be lost. The duality of that role carries a certain poetic weight. The baby in the manger would both be our guide and our Savior. He would go on to endure all things so that we may be free from pain and torment and attain exaltation. Through Christ we have the gift of agency and the gift of being saved from spiritual and physical death.

Our Gifts to the Savior

Most of you are familiar with Charles Dickens’ classic tale, A Christmas Carol, and its protagonist, Ebenezer Scrooge. In the story, which is set on Christmas Eve, Scrooge is a greedy, self-absorbed businessman with little regard for the welfare of others. As the story progresses Scrooge is visited by three different ghosts, each showing the past, present, and future. Through the experience Scrooge comes to understand the consequences of his treatment of others and the grim future that faces him if he continues down his current path. Scrooge awakens the next morning a changed man. He now looks outward and not inward for his joy. He finds that kindness, compassion, and generosity improve not just the lives of the people around him, but his own life.

When reading stories like A Christmas Carol we routinely focus on the “Christmas Spirit,” which is best described as a vague sense of charity, happiness, and do-goodery. After the publication of A Christmas Story local newspapers actually noted a sudden burst in charitable behavior in Britain. While this is wonderful, it is unfortunate that such selfless acts became popular due to a piece of literature and not because of a devotion to Christ. The real Spirit of Christmas comes from loving the Lord and following his example. Our greatest gift to Christ is our desire to emulate Him in all that we do.

So while Christ has given us innumerable gifts through his pre-mortal, mortal, and post-mortal ministries, what can we do to adequately commemorate His birth? The Gospel boils down to a few very simple, overarching principles. In Mark we are commanded to “love the Lord thy God with all the heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind, and with all thy strength,” which is regarded as the first great commandment. The second, of course, is to “love thy neighbor as thyself. There is no other commandment greater than these” (Mark 12:30-31, italics added). We learn in John that the greatest way to love the Lord is to keep his commandments. Through obedience, we celebrate the Atonement and make it a continual part of our lives; but just as important is to love others and to seek their welfare.

It is my hope that we will go out of our way to show Christlike compassion toward others. We commemorate the Lord’s birth once per year, but our responsibility to care for others and work to embody Christ’s love transcends seasons or holidays. Just as the Atonement is infinite, our eternal progression is neverending, and made possible only through the love of our Savior. The prophets of old testified of his coming. It is unfathomable that the Jews in the meridian of time saw the signs of his coming, yet failed to recognize their Messiah when he was physically in their midst. And today, in a society defined by rancor and schadenfreude, the potency of the Atonement is increasingly lost on more and more people. Doubt and disbelief are mistaken for intelligence and progression.

I testify that he did come and that he lives. His love for us is beyond our grasp and if we are willing to invest whatever level of faith in him that we do have, we will see that investment increase more than we can fathom. We never need to despair because He is always with us.

This Christmas, let us give gifts of faith, love, and charity. Let us help the less fortunate and strive to humble ourselves more. It is my prayer that as we spend Christmas with loved ones, enjoying holiday traditions and the festivities, that we will take the time to remember what joy there truly is to celebrate, for the Lord Jesus Christ was born and would go on to complete the ultimate sacrifice for all of us. Surely that is an occasion worth celebrating.

- Download "This Week in Mormons" Podcast MP3

Merry Christmas from us! We hope you have a nice holiday.

Should Al and Geoff walk the Camino de Santiago?

SNL has a ball with Tim Tebow, finished with a random joke about Mormonism being right all along! Hooray!

Times and Seasons‘ “Mormon of the Year” nominations are open. We want everyone to nominate and second Kevin Beckstrom for his fine work at Zarahemla Times. Or Rachel Vermillion. But really, Beckstrom. Come on!

A new study shows a growing gender gap within the Church – a growing ratio of women to men. What are the reasons? What can be done?

Likewise, another study officially proves every stereotype one has ever had about the Church.

Letter to Utah State – “What about that ‘Mormon problem’?”

Assorted news: An LDS father and son court investors for a Ponzi Scheme, using their “Mormonness” as incentive for trust; is multi-level marketing actually against Church teaching?; restored Provo Tabernacle “could be” a boon for Provo; Elder Cook urges a restoration of morality.

Linkage:

1. Letter to USU
2. Mormon Choral Organization CD
3. Gender gap widening
4. Study confirms every LDS stereotype ever
5. Mormonism used for investing
6. Provo Tabernacle could be good for Provo
7. Elder Cook urges a restoration of morality
8. Mormon of the Year!
9. Santaquin fires

This Is the Same Outfit She Wore to the Testing Center

- Download "This Week in Mormons" Podcast MP3

Party week! The guys behind Mom, I’m Dating a Mormon join us in the studio. It was surprisingly insightful to have them, not because their awesomeness is surprising, but because we at TWiM tend to act like dolts when we have guests on the show.

BYU-Idaho and skinny jeans – The debacle of the century. Get the latest news here. Are they allowed? Are they not? Questions! Answers!

Mitt Romney has an interesting few days, both in deciding to actually talk about his experiences in the Church, and also making unfortunate bets with Rick Perry.

Assorted: The Quetzaltenango Temple is dedicated, a funny Mormon Reditt thread, a profile of the female drummer in Neon Trees, the George Albert Smith manual, and virtual Christmas cards!

Links:

1. Neon Trees
2. Reditt
3. Musical Christmas videos
4. Skinny jeans
5. George Albert Smith
6. Romney talks religion

Numbers!

- Download "This Week in Mormons" Podcast MP3

First Presidency Christmas Devotional recaps, along with our thoughts on the new Bible Videos site.

The Kyiv Ukraine Temple receives a cool architectural award for being the best religious building constructed in Ukraine in 2010. Nasha Ukrayina!

BYU quarterback Jake Heaps is out. Al gives us his analysis.

The Student Review publishes a great article examining the political leanings of BYU professors, and how they are surprisingly balanced compared to most universities.

Did Korihor actually fight for religious freedom amidst a repressive theocracy?

Other items: Mitt Romney’s softer side; a call for the media to stop focusing on the sensational side of Mormonism; stop making fun of Mormons; and Donald Trump is a schmuck.

Links:

1. Kyiv Temple wins award
2. Bible Videos
3. BYU Professors and politics
4. Goodbye, Jake Heaps
5. Korihor – Freedom fighter?
6. Moving beyond sensationalism
7. Making fun of Mormonism

- Download "This Week in Mormons" Podcast MP3

Behold, a slow week in Mormon news! How do we react? Awesomely.

Going to BYU and not being LDS. How much does it suck?

David Archuleta goes to the temple and gets his Eagle Scout – at 20. What a little, wonderful man.

There is a MoTab Christmas YouTube channel. We repeat: A MoTab Christmas YouTube channel.

The US Senate recognizes the Church’s welfare program.

A dude says he was discriminated against for being Mormon.

And Latino LDS broadcast! ¡Qué chevre!

Touch me:

1. Are Mormons any weirder than the rest of us?
2. Being non-LDS at BYU
3. David Archuleta achieves!
4. US Senate and welfare program
5. Devocional latino
6. Prejudiced against for being Mormon?
7. MoTab Christmas Channel

Such Sultry Looks, Such Glistening Hair

- Download "This Week in Mormons" Podcast MP3

Modern Family causes a ruckus at BYU. One writer actually compares gay parents to prostitutes and serial killers. Yup.

Vasectomies. To consult the bishop or not to consult?

And bishops overall – Do we use them for general counsel or just for repentance?

Geoff and Al have a new website. Check it out!

Honorable mentions: Church service and how it moderates us; Mormon.org chat trolls; moldy churches in Norcal; and LDS Business College celebrates 125 years of mediocrity!

Clicketh thou me

1. Modern Family BYU drama
2. Mormon chat trolls
3. Neither hot nor cold
4. Three Witnesses monument hits 100
5. Joe Biden loves Mormons
6. LDSBC celebrates 100 years
7. Do not bulldoze the moldy church
8. Taking on vasectomies
9. Professor of the Year
10. Church service moderated Romney
11. New leadership training site
12. Our new website!

Don't Let Him Hold That Baby

- Download "This Week in Mormons" Podcast MP3

Some updates on the deaths of two missionaries in Texas. Sad times. One of them was right near the end of his mission, too.

Harold Bloom, reknowned jackweed, writes a very biased and senseless op-ed in the NYT. Joanna Brooks responds.

Inclusiveness in the Church or exclusivity? What make someone “Mormon”? We’re debating this, especially based on the big tent nature of recent “I’m a Mormon” videos. Are we in a position to judge someone’s “Mormon-ness”?

Other news: Over 40% of Americans are “uncomfortable” with having a Mormon in the White House, the Quetzaltenango Temple open house is underway, and good times with angry letters!

El Clique:

1. Remembering two missionaries
2. Quetzaltenango open house
3. Bloom article
4. Joanna Brooks’ response
5. Slate and Mormonism
6. A Mormon DJ raver madman
7. 4/10 Americans “uncomfortable” with a Mormon in the White House

Folk Music Just Won't Get You This Far

- Download "This Week in Mormons" Podcast MP3

Lighthearted discussion on LDS tech advances and the Church’s social media efforts. OK, we’re tech dorks. Sue us.

The Circling the Wagons conference – a Mormon LGBT gathering – took place in Salt Lake over the weekend. One bishop declared homophobia in the Church an “atrocity.” Pretty awesome stuff.

A well-intentioned article about fashionable modesty takes an unfortunate turn in effectively blaming immodesty on two cases of date rape. No bueno.

After last week’s Halloween/modesty debacle, Geoff takes on the practice of garment “tucking.” Get ready, ladies!

Other news: Hilary Weeks tops the charts (sort of), Federal lawsuits against the Church being involved in Utah’s liquor laws, and two cool videos (see below), and a prophet occupies Wall Street.

Clickety Clickster Clickerrific:

1. Homophobia “an atrocity”
2. Modesty and date rape
3. Barring the Church from liquor law input
4. Hilary Weeks is first Mormon to debut atop Christian charts
5. A prophet occupies Wall Street

Holland Rocks It!

- Download "This Week in Mormons" Podcast MP3

Happy belated Halloween to everyone. Let’s talk about two things: 1) Why cross dressing is allegedly banned at church Halloween parties; 2) Why Halloween is apparently some sort of free pass to skank it up (and we don’t mean the ska dance).

It was hard to miss the New York Times’ really odd article about Mormon Hipsters – Mipsters – and how the way to be cool and Mormon is to rebel a little. Al and Geoff disagree a lot on this one.

Google has rectified its injustice against Mitt Romney. Which injustice? Listen in to find out.

Homeless people already live in cities of trash, so why are LDS teens in Mesa/Gilbert building cardboard cities? To taunt the homeless? To show they they can build in an hour what it takes weeks for a homeless person to obtain?

Jon Huntsman’s daughters are crazy, and not in the fun, hot way of Dubya’s.

Ze Links:

1. Mipsters
2. Hispanics and Mitt Romney
3. Google hates Mitt
4. Where does your freshman class come from?
5. Cross dressing and Trunk or Treat
6. Cities of trash

Adding Insult to Injury

Look What I Made!

- Download "This Week in Mormons" Podcast MP3

Elder Oaks testifies before the Senate. Orrin Hatch rejoices.

Joe Lieberman speaks at BYU, says he loves Mitt Romney, and encourages everyone to vote for Romney.

Mormons and Muslims need to be better friends. They have too much in common to ignore each other. Let’s make this marriage happen.

Jon Huntsman did sorta OK on “The Colbert Report.” (see below)

Other: Sapporo Japan Temple breaks ground, Ben Folds cries because of white boys singing hip hop, Awkward Mormon Family Photos… and more!

Links:

1. Sapporo Japan Temple
2. Elder Oaks testifies before the Senate
3. Most Americans have no problem with Mormon candidates
4. Joe Lieberman at BYU
5. Mormons and Muslims
6. Awkward Mormon Family Photos

- Download "This Week in Mormons" Podcast MP3

It’s time for the TWiM rage regarding the “Mormons are a cult” nonsense that’s been going around for the past week. We’re fed up. Why is it OK to hate on Mormons but not on other groups? It’s high time we stopped putting up with it. We at This Week in Mormons stand shoulder to shoulder with our fellow Latter-day Saints. Enough is enough.

Is NCMO abuse? Some lady says yes. We say no. Is this a battle of the sexes? No. Because we’ll win.

Brandon Flowers’ officially embraces being Mormon in a new “I’m a Mormon” video.

Others: Homeschooling. The Whitney Awards (yippee). And a terrible video done by BYU-I girls who have nothing better to do on a Friday night.

Link

1. Is NCMO abuse?
2. Judge the Man, Not the Mormon – Joe Lieberman
3. Evangelicals Should Stand Up to Anti-Mormonism – John Mark Reynolds
4. Who Says Mormons Aren’t Christians? – Dean Obeidallah
5. Open Letter to Mitt Romney
6. How Do Mormons Answer ‘Not Christian’ Claims? – Michael Otterson
7. Rick Perry Amplifies Anti-Mormon Rhetoric
8. Rick Perry’s Anti-Mormon Advisors - McKay Coppins
9. Nominations for the Whitney Awards
10. Homeschooling Then and Now
11. Ten Years of the Perpetual Education Fund

Jerk.

 

The Original Christus

- Download "This Week in Mormons" Podcast MP3

Part Two of our General Conference recap continues. So many inspired leaders. So little time.

Our boy McKay Coppins is among the names mentioned in a survey administered by the Church to find out which blogs and writers the saints read. TWiM has, sadly, not made it on the list. Fix this, people!

Do we have an obligation to support Vocal Point in “The Sing-Off” because they are Mormon?

- Download "This Week in Mormons" Podcast MP3

This past weekend was General Conference. What does that mean for TWiM? A special episode of This Week in Mormons in which we pore through the content of about half of Conference and talk about what spoke to us the most. We’ll cover the rest of it next week.

We are forgoing the typical writeup format for the week. However, here is an article that was mentioned during the show about non-members watching Conference.

If you missed Conference, get the sessions here.

We couldn’t leave you without a few humorous things. Below is a picture from Times and Seasons that we thought was great. Below that is a video celebrating something wonderful for the future.

Happy Conferencing!

- Download "This Week in Mormons" Podcast MP3

A local Young Men’s president is released for refusing to run the annual Friends of Scouting drive, citing high salaries to local Boy Scout leaders and a lack of funds actually going to the local unit. Crazy story. Listen in to hear the details.

Our General Conference predictions. We’re mostly sad that with Mormon Times having folded back into Deseret News, we have no stories to report on conference food traditions and recipes for cinnamon rolls. Dangit!

After a long hiatus, we bring back our “Rants!” segment. Al and Geoff both have some bones to pick.

Other: A Mormon president in… Mali?, Iceland Mormon cultural center, and if you are 1) Single and 2) Mormon – 4) Get Help!

1. The end of scouting
2. Iceland in the Church
3. Mormons for Mali
4. All the single Mormons (All the single Mormons)

Stupid Crutchy

- Download "This Week in Mormons" Podcast MP3

Our analysis of the cultural impact and awesome move by the Church with the Philadelphia Temple, for which ground was broken this past weekend. Strong move by the Church.

Senior Missionaries – Why don’t more of them serve? Elder Holland has some ideas. So does the Bloggernacle.

MoBach is over. Talk about a letdown. Sheesh. A boring season ends with a boring post-mortem.

Geoff went to Iceland. He is a changed man.

The actor who played John in one of the temple films was digitally removed and replaced with another actor. Why would the Church bother to yank someone from a twenty-year-old film? We’re really curious about the reasoning behind this.

Other stuff: Cow moosick in France, the BYU Student Review is resurrected, Frats and sororities at the U of U are gone, the Payson Temple goes viral, and a little website that got Al into a whole lotta trouble.

Links:

1. Payson Temple rendering
2. Desperately Seeking Seniors
3. Elder Holland on senior missionaries
4. John yanked?
5. Temple John, where have you gone?
6. Moosick
7. Goodbye, Frats
8. BYU Student Review (awesome!)
9. Philly Temple

Fair listener, we always encourage you to subscribe in iTunes, but you are welcome to stream below via YouTube.

Teacher’s manual

Student manual

“Your Potential, Your Privilege” - Deiter F. Uchtdorf

“Called to Be Saints” – Benjamín de Hoyos

- Download "This Week in Mormons" Podcast MP3

Judas

We are joined by the folks behind the “Most Interesting Mormon in the World” YouTube vids – Melissa Parker, Corbin Frost, and Adam Johnson. So kind of them to join us. We had a blast.

The tenth anniversary of 9/11 has come and gone. How did you remember? We discuss President Monson’s remarks in the Washington Post, MoTab with Tom Brokaw, and “Chosen People Syndrome” – the myth of, miraculously, no Mormons dying in the attacks of September 11th.

A British bus company has forbidden missionaries from tracting on its buses. We predict better adjusted and fewer guilt-ridden missionaries in the future.

Other assorted: Payson Temple groundbreaking, Mountain Meadows Monument gets “National” status, a BoM movie (no, not that one), and a new poll showing that Americans still think Mormons are polygamists. Goodie.

Links:

1. President Monson’s op-ed
2. “Chosen People Syndrome”
3. Groundbreaking for Payson Temple
4. Mountain Meadows Monument
5. Book of Mormon Movie!
6. Study about Mormons and Polygamy
7. No more bus preaching
8. Follow Adam on Twitter and his website
9. Follow Corbin on Twitter and his website

As usual, please subscribe in iTunes, but if you adamantly refuse, you can stream it here.

Teacher’s manual

Student manual

“More Than Conquerors through Him That Loved Us” – Paul V. Johnson

- Download "This Week in Mormons" Podcast MP3

LDS men are marrying older for a number of weak reasons and Al questions statistics about LDS divorce rates.

The Provo Travelodge is no more! What?! Yes, folks, the Church has bought it along with other parcels of land adjacent to the burned-down Provo Tabernacle. Is this suspect?

An awesome looking, privately-funded Joseph Smith movie is out. Al has is pre-review, also known as a preview.

The Boise Temple is getting a $13M renovation. Finally, Boise will be given justice!

Other news: Updates on Mitch Mayne, the gay bishopric member; missionary mauled by a lion is recovering; pansies in Fort Collins; Brokaw and MoTab remember 9/11; Bushman!

Links:

1. Lion mauling
2. Church buys Travelodge
3. Pansies in Fort Collins
4. New Joseph Smith movie (video below)
5. Boise gets upgraded
6. Bushman’s rules for himself
7. Mormon men fear marriage
8. Mitch Mayne
9. MoTab, Brokaw, Remember 9/11
10. Relative Finder App for Facebook

Hey, Play That One by George Michael!

It’s just so awesomely terrible.

- Download "This Week in Mormons" Podcast MP3

Earthquakes! Hurricanes! Michelle Bachmann would have us believe that God is punishing DC. Geoff reports from the ground.

A bishop is hit with felony charges for failing to report a sexual assault on one of his flock. How do bishops balance discretion and confidence with a duty to report lawbreaking?Joanna Brooks has some tough questions for LDS politicians.

Joanna Brook is all over the news this week.

Jimmer’s getting married. Get over it. To find out how his honeymoon will be, see Episode #53.

How does Mitt’s experience distributing welfare and assistance as a bishop play into his political views?

Assorted: Mormons on NPR, 18 year-old missionaries, temples help property values, a new MYC building, and Warren Jeffs is in a coma. Whoopie!

Links:

• Bishop charged
• Spires break off DC Temple in quake
• NPR and the Misunderstood Faith of Mormons
• Joanna Brooks asks the tough questions
• Goodbye, Melvin J. Ballard Building. Hello, Jacob Hamblin Building
• 18 year-old Elders. Yikes
• Property values and LDS Temples – FAIR
• Mitt and welfare
• Bowling, Geoff’s mom, and the Mormon Times

I Represent the Lollipop Guild

- Download "This Week in Mormons" Podcast MP3

Yet another article about how Mormons are leaders, but from a different angle! Mormons aren’t just business leaders because they love business, but because Church culture helps people learn to organize others.

The Ogden Temple Facelift. Good or bad? Does it diss the original architect? Are we ditching a dated, but unique, building in favor of something far more modern, generic, and less distinctive?

The Washington Post acknowledges that Mormons know how to use the internet. We take charge of our own message and don’t let other dominate the conversation.

John Huntsman: Jack Mormon. It’s official, but we still love him.

Assorted: San Salvador Temple dedicated; Mormons quest for the White House; an openly gay man serving in a bishopric; and more Washington, DC singles! This time on PBS!

Lists of clickety clickers:

1. San Salvador Temple dedicated
2. Ogden Temple. Botched surgery?
3. Mormon men are uber organized
4. Huntsman – “The Church was wrong”
5. Vogue profile of Huntsman – “Like reformed Jews”
6. The Mormon quest for the Presidency
7. Using the Web to control the image
8. Openly gay bishopric member

Watch the full episode. See more Religion & Ethics NewsWeekly.

Ed Hardy spokesman Jordan Miles, known for his trademark phrase, “Hey, gel me up!” gets the chance to take out Ashley. Our Bachelorette seems smitten by his burliness. Will it lead to sparks?

Jordan goes low-key for the date, packing a picnic to be enjoyed in a parking lot, and then some dancing with another woman. Awesome.

- Download "This Week in Mormons" Podcast MP3

In case you missed it, Stephen Colbert gives Mormons some love. It’s awesome. High-five a tiger!

Arizona has two Mormons vying for the GOP nomination for the Senate race, and they’re in the same ward. “It’s like a Mormon version of Jerry Springer,” sources say.

We have a great discussion about less activity, the at-risk demographic of 25-35 within the Church, and the shortcomings of the Institute program.

Noted LDS scholar and “we’re-different-from-you” missionary work advocate, Gary Lawrence, publishes a new book about Mormon misconceptions. Rock it, Gary!

Sherlock Holmes – banned in parts of Virginia for being anti-Mormon.

Links:

1. Two Mormons. One Senate seat. Same ward.
2. Mitt Romney’s finances
3. BYU broadcasting building dedicated
4. Sherlock Holmes banned
5. Ramadan at BYU
6. Philadelphia Temple groundbreaking

Ward Wars

 

The Colbert Report
Get More: Colbert Report Full Episodes,Political Humor & Satire Blog,Video Archive

 

 

David Johnson is a wonderful kid. We’re sure the MoBach people had good intentions by having Ashley take him out (watch the video to see how many times the “tables are turned,” according to them), but in the end, this comes off as a cheap and exploitative move. Honestly, the three of us (Jenna Kim Jones joins) were more appalled and upset by this than anything else.

That said, David is a radical dancer and a pretty hilarious kid. We would all learn a lot from how carefree and whole he is.

He neither swings for the fence, nor does he strike out the side. We learn very little about Brandon, due to all of four minutes that we spend in his presence.

Who is he? What does he offer? We may never know. Ashley plays this one close to her heart, and tells some truly atrocious jokes along the way.

Once again, we welcome Jenna Kim Jones

Subscribe in iTunes. It’s the best way to go! If not, stream it here.
Teachers manual

Student manual

- Download "This Week in Mormons" Podcast MP3

Please join us all in wishing a belated birthday to Al. The man brings us so much joy and happiness. The man is Mormon hungover.

A poll on Heavenly Mother. Who is she? What is her relationship to Heavenly Father? By Common Consent seeks to find the answer.

The FAIR Conference has concluded, with an interesting presentation about the old Spalding-Rigdon theory about the authorship of the Book of Mormon. Pretty interesting stuff.

Joanna Brooks has a post about five myths of Mormonism. Terrific stuff. We are not all white!

Speaking of whiteness, Michael Otterson has a few things to say about the Church’s internationalization and how 52% of Mormons now live outside of the US and Canada.

Other news: Some funerals for noted former LDS leadership, Mormonism will save the GOP from xenophobia, the Mormon Defense League website, a cryptically Book of Mormon-inspired action movie, and Brandon Davies is making a comeback! Four more years! Four more years!

Clicks:

1. Heavenly Mother is…
2. FAIR Conference stuff
3. Five myths about Mormons
4. Funerals for her and for him
5. Mormons will save the GOP
6. Otterson rocks the casbah
7. Mormon Defense League
8. BoM-inspired movie?
9. Brandon Davies is no longer breaking the Honor Code

I'm Leaving You

Enemy of Angry Birds everywhere, Graydon Anderson knows how to woo the ladies, mostly by forcing Ashley to – once again- show her domestic skills. What’s with all the guys making her cook or make desserts??

Graydon is well-traveled, like Ashley. He also knows the value in visiting old people. Yes, Graydon takes Ashley to visit a geriatric. The man is an altruist to the core!

Watch him melt her heart… AND HER FACE.

Please subscribe in iTunes. If you really really don’t like iTunes or us, you can stream it here.

Teacher’s manual

Student manual

Pete Howe. Linguist. Philanthropist. Chiropterologist. Salesman?

Yes, Pete does it all, but does he put the moves on Ashley? Of course not. The men on MoBach have no cojones. Love the royal purple, though.

- Download "This Week in Mormons" Podcast MP3

Douglass Brown vows to never read the Daily Universe again. What this means for your weekend and salvation, just ahead.

BeliefNet writer finishes his month trying to be Mormon. Really insightful stuff!

A new study shows that using pornography results in violent behavior. Heady stuff.

Good ol’ Mark Hoffman has resurfaced. Actual tapes of him conducting his business have been discovered. These are the only audio recordings of Hoffman in action.

Warren Jeffs promises a scourge upon those who are prosecuting him. Sickness and death! Man! Go FLDS!

New Jerusalem set in Goshen, UT is completed. Can we get a tour? Is this our own Holy Land Experience?

The Mormon Bachelorette is down. It’s down, people! In its place, we are bombarded with the “Mormon Matchmaker.”

According to Al, people freaked out on a Mormon trek through Iowa but the street fell apart and they were forced to walk on dirt. Find the truth here!

Links:

1. BeliefNet blog
2. New Jersusalem set
3. The Mormon Matchmaker
4. Douglass Brown puts down The Daily Universe, add him on Facebook!
5. Warren Jeffs condemns everyone
6. FLDS temple, Righteous Branch of LDS
7. Mark Hoffman in the news
8. Porn leads to violence

The New Jerusalem

Subscribe in iTunes or click to stream

 Teacher’s manual

Class member study guide

- Download "This Week in Mormons" Podcast MP3

Myrtle Madness has ended! Geoff and Al recount… some of their adventures.

President Monson’s stalker believes himself to be Jesus. As he stands trial, he tells authorities that he had problems, “Only President Monson could help [him] with.”

Mitt Romney’s Mormonism is only known by 40% of Americans. Let’s keep it hush hush so that the 25% who won’t vote for a Mormon don’t realize that Romney’s one of them!

A temple marriage petition to allow civil marriages immediately before a sealing. Al and Geoff debate the tenets of said petition!

Mormon Matters does a great podcast about modesty. We highly recommend listening.

Links:

1. Old Grantsville church for sale
2. Mormon Matters: Modesty
3. Paris Temple updates (in French)
4. Lame dating experts
5. Monson stalker
6. Mormonism and the “cult box”
7. Romney’s religion unknown to most
8. Church gets a Roku channel
9. Mainstream Christians can learn from Mormons
10. Temple wedding petition
11. Elder Cook throws a pitch
12. We’ve found one of four immortals
13. Ron Howard directs stupid movie

Have You Seen This Boy?

 

The Paris-Versailles Urban Youth Center

We love Matt. He’s a financial genius. He is also a lover of classy chain restaurants, like Famous Dave’s and Applebee’s. According to Matt, Famous Dave’s is a local restaurant. Oh, Matty!

Kurt is our special friend from Minnesota. He is a a rock star of sorts, wooing the ladies with his adrenaline junkie nature. Why put yourself in a situation that involves genuine conversation when you can ride a craptastic roller coaster?? Behold, the glory that is Kurt!

Legal enthusiast Daniel Woolston takes us on Date #6. Daniel has decided that hanging out in a McMansion is impressive to the ladies, also using the date as a chance to test Ashley’s nascent domestic skills.

Listen to the show here.

Teachers manual

Student manual

Join Fourth of July-ruiner and “Shave and a Haircut” aficionado Derrick Williams on his quest to use pyrotechnics to get Ashley’s prim and proper walls to collapse. Will he be successful? We may never know!

Derrick also has inappropriate feelings for goldfish.

- Download "This Week in Mormons" Podcast MP3

We come to you live from exotic Myrtle Beach, SC! Myrtle Mayhem!

Ainsley Earhardt, a Fox News correspondent, says that Mitt Romney is “not Christian.” This has really incensed not just Latter-day Saints, but many Mormon apologists across a wide religious spectrum. Fair and balanced. Right.

Noted blogger and social media magnate Jesse Stay writes and insightful and inviting piece about reasons to believe the Church. This is one of the better reads we’ve come across in some time.

The Church’s tax-exempt status has been called into question as the Church seeks to mollify those who would attempt to strip it.

Utah Democrats are rocking the casbah.

France is getting a temple! Awesome! This sparks a discussion about general Church administration, namely the rationale behind temples in places where the work is actually receding.

Lil Wayne and Jimmer. Together forever.

The Mormon Times is gone! Well, sorta.

Touch me for luck:

1. Christiangate
1. Basic story on Fox news and Romney
2. Op-ed criticizing Fox News
3. Joanna Brooks has her say
2. Jesse Stay’s great piece
3. Church’s tax-exempt status
4. Utah Democrats
5. Temple in France
6. Toronto consolidates missions
7. Li’l Wayne raps Jimmer
8. Angel Moroni tops Brigham City Temple

On-leave sailor Chris Morales gets the nod for Date #4. Chris actually seems like a pretty cool guy, and it was good to hear his conversion story. Can he wow Ashley with his convert rhetoric and baby boomer dancing skills?

For date number three we are joined by Tadd Sorenson, a sort of jack-of-all-doucheyness. Actually, we personally think Tadd is funny in small doses, but he appears to be on the date for his own amusement rather than to love Ashley tender. Shame on him! That is not True Mormon Love©.

- Download "This Week in Mormons" Podcast MP3

Magically terrific documentary video of two LDS missionaries in the Washington, DC area. Way to get on your film noir, Washington Post.

The Joanna Brooks show! Joanna Rocks Fox News and also wonders if Mitt Romney is developing a sense of humor about his religion.

President Monson has a stalker. Benjamin Staples, you nefarious fool!

Tricia Erickson is crazy.

Assorted: Harry Potter/Book of Mormon mashup, Mormons in the MLB All-Star Game, Fort Collins Temple location announced

Click Me:

1. Romney and long underwear
2. Brooks and Fox News
3. Tricia Erickson and insanity
4. Missionaries and film noir
5. Monson and stalkers
6. Sactown and Jimmergasms
7. Mormons and All-Stars
8. Fort Collins and Colorado

Follow Ashley’s adventures as she goes out with gangbanger and fruity candy enthusiast Jace Mattinson. Will there be love? Will there be forced smiles? Jace later calls this “the best date [he's] ever been on.” WOW!

• Student Manual
• Teacher’s Manual
• “The Greatest Week in History” - Daniel H. Ludlow
• “The Ancient Practice of Crucifixion” - Richard Lloyd Anderson

You wanted it! You begged for it! And here it is! MoBach Theatre, presented by This Week in Mormons. No more Throwdowns, people; just pure, adulterated video.

Aaron rocks the guitar. He rocks the roller skates. But will he rock Ashley’s body?

- Download "This Week in Mormons" Podcast MP3

Happy Independence Day, Venezuela and Algeria! Happy belated Canada Day to our Canadian friends!

Al desperately wants to help midgets having car trouble.

We hope you all had a wonderful Fourth of July!

Robin Williams makes a joke at the expense of the Church, and the press gives it way more coverage than it deserves!

Mormons have a disproportionately high level of representation in Congress. Because of this, as well as the “Mormon Moment” stuff, Asians are furious! Furious!

Other stuff: A Mountain Meadows landmark receives National status, Peggy Fletcher Stack gets hers, some LDS teens are the greatest auto technicians in the world!, updates on GAs not being involved in politics, some temple news…

…and The Zarahemla Times!!

Links:

1. Mormon teens are automotive geniuses
2. EXCLUSIVE! LDS Church leaders have donated to political candidates
3. Mountain Meadows Monument
4. Mormons vs. Asians
5. Robin Williams is soooooo funny
   1. Keep it under your hat
6. We are not alone
7. Temple updates

• • • • • • • Class Member Study Guide
            • Teachers Manual
            • Alma 7:13-14
            • Luke 22
            • Matthew 26
            • Mark 14
            • “Overcome..Even As I Also Overcame” – Neal A. Maxwell
            • “None Were With Him” – Jeffrey R. Holland

- Download "This Week in Mormons" Podcast MP3

Jon Huntsman has a terrible website. Seriously. Time to fire the social media and digital communications staff.

It turns out General Authorities can’t take part in political campaigns. Who woulda thought? We long for the days of Apostles serving concurrently in the Eisenhower administration. *sigh*…

Richard Bushman, author of Rough Stone Rolling and other works, responds to the humorous, yet false nature of “The Book of Mormon” musical…. not the book. The book is true, people!

Al is in love with a story about what he alleges is every missionary’s fantasy. What a terrible, terrible person.

This land is your land, O Canada!

Mormon.org on Times Square appears to be yielding results, at least in terms of traffic.

Hey athletes, put your church first and stop hosing around with money and fame.

Links:

1. ABC and the “Mormon Moment”
2. Is the “Mormon Moment” good?
3. Vote Huntsman because he speaks Chinese?
4. In DC and hate driving to the temple? Take the shuttle!
5. Mission before baseball
6. Bushman weighs in
7. Nigerian chess champs!
8. GAs can’t campaign
9. Of Missionaries, tabloids, and leggy women
10. O Canada!
11. Times Square Mormon.org

Progress at Brigham City Temple

- Download "This Week in Mormons" Podcast MP3

Enjoy our new feature where we go over a forthcoming Gospel Doctrine lesson for the week in about ten minutes. Ten minutes! Ten minutes and you’re done! We do ask that you please let us know how you like this new venture, so we can gauge whether it’s of use to anyone or not.

Mucho thanks!

• Teacher’s manual
• Class member study guide
• John 17
• “Receive the Holy Ghost” – David A. Bednar, Oct. 2010 Conference

- Download "This Week in Mormons" Podcast MP3

Well what a program! Such a fun show for everyone this week.

We’re joined by Jenna Kim Jones, of Jenna Kim Jones fame. She’s hilarious! Those of you in Utah can see her perform stand-up on July 8-9 at Wiseguys in Trolley Square. Jenna also takes questions about the “Weiner Wheel” on The Daily Show.

Kevin Beckstrom. Oh Kevin Beckstrom. The man has finally crossed the line. Find out how.

Where is the line between lovingly mocking Mormons and actually preaching hatred? Are we too passive as LDS people? Should we stand up to all of this nonsense?

Cecil Samuelson visits the Scottish Parliament, only to be rebuked by a member of said Parliament; and then that Member of Parliament is rebuked by someone else in Parliament. Rebuking in Edinburgh!

Want to go on an ice cream hike with us? Too bad. We don’t want to.

The Ft. Lauderdale Temple is underway, writers debate “The Book of Mormon” coming to Salt Lake, and there’s a Thomas S. Monson camp in Ontario??

Links:

1. Mocking Mormons
   1. Susan Brooks Thislethwaite
   2. Teasing makes Mormons merrier
   3. “Amos and Andy”
   4. Bom to SLC?
   5. Commentary on NYC “I’m a Mormon” campaign
2. Cecil in Edinburgh, Cecil rebuked
3. Alaska missionaries use typewriter
4. Racism in the Church – Peggy Fletcher Stack
5. They’re here, they’re square, get used to it!
6. Thomas S. Monson Park?
7. New Gallup poll about Mormons
8. Elder Packer faints. He’s OK now and on his way home.
9. Geoff wrote a lovely article about whether a Mormon can even be active when President of the US

- Download "This Week in Mormons" Podcast MP3

Enjoy our new feature where we go over a forthcoming Gospel Doctrine lesson for the week in about ten minutes. Ten minutes! Ten minutes and you’re done! We do ask that you please let us know how you like this new venture, so we can gauge whether it’s of use to anyone or not.

Mucho thanks!

• Student Manual
• Luke 22 (The Sacrament)
• John 13 (Washing the feet)
• John 14 (The way)
• John 15 (The Vine)
• A complimentary visual aid

Can an LDS President even be active in the Church?

Ah, the smell of politics. I love it. Fewer things bring me more joy than a new election season getting underway. Mitt Romney might have recently tried to evade questions about his Mormonism, but in the end, being Mormon is something that cannot be downplayed, especially not if or when Romney takes higher office.

I want to talk about what would happen if Mitt Romney were elected President. I’m not talking about policy issues, Bible Belt pandering, a Mormon foreign policy, or anything like that. I’m strictly talking about what electing an active Mormon to the highest office in the United States means for his or her ability to actually participate actively in church. Mormonism is much different from most other faiths in terms of what it requires of its adherents on a daily basis, and electing one to the White House would seemingly come with a whole slew of complications.

The first thing that comes to mind is regular Sunday attendance. Most sources say that Mitt Romney is a TBM, and since we’re not so sure about that Jon Huntsman fella, let’s focus on the real TBM. Regardless, how on earth would the President of the United States mosey up to the Friendship Heights DC stake center every Sunday for services? Would it even be possible? I remember when Dick Cheney spoke at BYU’s graduation in 2007. Attendees were required to arrive two hours in advance. Everyone had to go through security screening. This was for Dick Cheney. The Vice President. At a largely Republican university. In Utah.

So then what of the actual Presidency? And in communist DC to boot? Ronald Reagan was a church-going fella throughout his public life, even as Governor of California; but the Presidency ruined that for him. He tried to attend church services at first, but it was too much of a security issue to bear, so he and Nancy eventually stopped attending Sunday services.

I don’t see how Mitt could actually go to church. There’s no way to secure a church building each week and screen everyone there. It would be both disruptive to the meetings and way too much of a security hassle for the President’s men and those in the local congregation.

But it’s still fun to imagine. Picture the poor Elders quorum teacher who has the gall to point at Mr. President during a lesson, only to be tackled by Secret Servicemen, or the bomb dogs that are forced to sniff the sacrament bread and water. The possibilities are endless.

Then how do we bridge the gap? Security-cleared local deacons going to the White House to give the Romneys the sacrament every Sunday? The DC stake actually dedicating a portion of the White House as a legit meetinghouse for the Romneys and any associates? That wouldn’t work – state property being reserved for the use of a specific religion. Just imagine the poor teachers who try to knock on the White House for fast offerings.

Do you think Mitt would have a calling? I think this is one case where the Church would let it slide. I’ve heard stories about Harry Reid teaching gospel doctrine, and he even has security with him most of the time, but the responsibilities of the Presidency are an entirely different beast. Still, I like to imagine Brother Romney teaching irritating eleven-year-olds, trying to use economic parables to get his point across.

Even without a calling or the ability to attend church regularly, I really wish Mitt would still be asked to home teach. It would set an example for priesthood holders that no one is “too busy” to fulfill his calling. If President Romney has time to visit a family in Adams-Morgan, surely we lowly peasants can muster some quality time with our assigned families. Regardless, if you want to talk about a defining characteristic of a presidency, how about one centered on the importance of serving others?

And now we arrive at the temple. I like to think an LDS president would crave the guidance and peace that the temple brings more than most other people, yet being able to attend comes with a number of complications. Just think about it. Either Romney’s bodyguards would need to be LDS and basically do temple work with him, or the temple would actually need to be secured and patrolled. Just imagine seeing Secret Service guys milling about the grounds of the DC Temple! Or better yet, LDS Secret Service guys inside the temple…armed. Firearms in the temple? Not likely.

I think there is an easier option with regards to the temple. All too often the hoopla surrounding the President’s travel and itinerary seem to put him at greater risk than if he were to just sneak around incognito. If Romney were to roll into the temple grounds of DC unannounced, there wouldn’t be anyone expecting him and he could probably go about his business with minimal interference. Obviously, I am not privy to the ins and outs and harsh realities of Presidential security, but I think I’m onto something here.

What other issues do you see arising in terms of Church activity for an LDS President? Would electing the ecumenically ambiguous Jon Huntsman be easier in the long run? Do we as a church welcome the scrutiny and increased exposure that would come to our meetings from having a Mormon President? Are you less inclined to vote for someone who is LDS not because of his or her beliefs, but because of the security nightmare it could potentially represent?

Personally, I love the thought of an actively LDS  President somehow managing to stay involved in his or her ward and stake. I don’t look to LDS politicians as spiritual examples, but it would be hard to ignore the powerful message someone as busy as the President could send to the Saints through trying to maintain a similar degree of activity as that of other active members.

Mitt, you should address this. Forget the economy. I want to know what your plan is to somehow juggle ward clerk and President.

- Download "This Week in Mormons" Podcast MP3

Unrelated to Mormon news, but Al continues to fail to understand why Geoff loves Disneyland so much.

KSL drops “The Playboy Club” because of its relation to some sort of obscure gentlemen’s magazine. TV affiliates picking and choosing in an effort to censor. Right or wrong?

To no one’s surprise, “The Book of Mormon” cleans up at the Tonys. The Church has responded by started an “I’m a Mormon” campaign on Times Square.

Branch presidents are getting deported, and the Church releases another statement on immigration, this one siding a bit more with the law.

Does being a Mormon and – more importantly – serving a mission influence foreign policy outlook?

Mitt debates and appears on Piers Morgan. And boy is he a defensive kid!

Other news: Glenn Beck has a new site, the Church gets social networking into genealogy work, Deseret Book releases an iOS app, LDS fraternities get the axe, and those blasted Texans won’t let us build a meetinghouse!

…And… “The Marriage Ref” is still ON??????

Clickety Clik:

1. Open letter to evangelical critic by Michael Otterson
2. Social networking and genealogy
3. Mitt and Piers
4. Glenn Beck’s new network
5. Book of Mormon at the Tonys
6. “I’m a Mormon” in NYC
7. Immigration
   1. Both sides like new Church statement
   2. Two branch presidents deported
   3. Official Church statement
8. Dang you, Texas!
9. Goodbye, “Playboy Club”
10. Deseret Book iPhone app
11. Mormonism and Foreign Policy

- Download "This Week in Mormons" Podcast MP3

Enjoy our new feature where we go over a forthcoming Gospel Doctrine lesson for the week in about ten minutes. Ten minutes! Ten minutes and you’re done! We do ask that you please let us know how you like this new venture, so we can gauge whether it’s of use to anyone or not.

Mucho thanks!

• Matthew 25
• Read lesson in the New Testament Class Member Study Guide
• Lynn G. Robbins – “Oil in Our Lamps”
• Ronald A. Rasband – “Parables of Jesus: The Parable of the Talents”

- Download "This Week in Mormons" Podcast MP3

Phoenix Temple construction gets underway.

Missionary guidelines for senior couples change. Listen in to find out how!

The Moscow Stake is organized by Elder Nelson. Horosho, indeed.

Links:

 
1. Phoenix Temple groundbreaking
2. Most awesome Crystal City singles headline yet
3. Geriatric Missionary guidelines changing
4. Romney on Newsweek
5. Mormons Rock!
6. Stories about YSA. Ye or nay?
7. Evangelicals and the Romney question
8. New PEW poll

- Download "This Week in Mormons" Podcast MP3

Enjoy our new feature where we go over a forthcoming Gospel Doctrine lesson for the week in about ten minutes. Ten minutes! Ten minutes and you’re done! We do ask that you please let us know how you like this new venture, so we can gauge whether it’s of use to anyone or not.

Mucho thanks!

- Download "This Week in Mormons" Podcast MP3

More madness about the Crystal City chapel. Seriously, it’s like the media thinks this is the first time a singles ward has been created. The Washington Post and Time are to blame this time around.

Joanna Brooks rocks an evangelical author who argues that a vote for Mitt Romney is a vote for the LDS Church.

Does your horse have equine herpes? Never fear! Stick ponies are here!

Al loves the Book of Mormon soundtrack.

Mitt Romney loves the Book of Mormon musical, too, apparently. *cough*

A real Mormon is on the real Bachelorette, and the Mormon Bachelorette has also been announced. It is a scary week for all of us.

Links:

1. Joanna Brooks rocks….
2. …this man for saying this
3. Elizabeth Smart talks the mish
4. Ride the Tiger! (Pony)
5. Washington Post wants you to get married, LDS kids
6. Time Magazine does not understand singles wards
7. Listen to the BoM soundtrack
8. Mitt wants to see “The Book of Mormon”
9. Jon Heder gets a pilot
10. Jimmer should stay in Utah
11. A Mormon on The Bachelorette
12. A Mormon Bachelorette

Hi Ashley, We Look Forward to Making Fun of Your Experience

It's All A Conspiracy!

- Download "This Week in Mormons" Podcast MP3

Enjoy our new feature where we go over a forthcoming Gospel Doctrine lesson for this week in about ten minutes. Ten minutes! Ten minutes and you’re done! We do ask that you please let us know how you like this new venture, so we can gauge whether it’s of use to anyone or not.

Mucho thanks!

- Download "This Week in Mormons" Podcast MP3

No Rapture. Life goes on.

Bob Woodward hires Geoff as his personal massage therapist!

Are you TBM? Mitt Romney is. But ARE YOU??

Ladies, stop pining away after President Uchtdorf. You are coveting. COVETING!

A Merrill Lynch employee allegedly gets sacked for being “too Mormon.” Lame.

Geoff has a ball reviewing a review of the recent box office flop, “Priest.” It pertains to LDS people, don’t worry.

And…temple closures, temple open houses, updates on the Brock case, and Huntsman hates utah!

Link:

1. MoBach begins new season
2. Rapture Poll
3. Open house of Quetzaltenango Temple
4. Boise Temple closing… FOREVER! K, not really.
5. Huntsman hates Utah
6. Bishops in the Brock case not prosecuted
7. “Priest”!
8. Stop dreaming of becoming Mrs. Uchtdorf
9. Merrill Lynch discriminates
10. TBM = dumb
11. This is not what the Mormons do in Rome

- Download "This Week in Mormons" Podcast MP3

The King James Version of the Bible turns 400! Pretty cool. We discuss some of the history of the KJV and celebrate through holy reverence.

Peggy Fletcher Stack continues to amaze! She’s our new McKay. Geoff spends awhile lambasting a new article about the Crystal City ward, which is apparently a YSA ward (it’s not) and is also synonymous with a church building (it’s not).

Romney. Huntsman. We don’t want to beat a dead horse, but perhaps they effectively come from different generations of Mormons, thus explaining their different ways of addressing their faith publicly.

We love pantyhose, and things transpired in the past week that will deeply hurt our preference for those lovely nylon leg-shapers!

Al mocks Geoff for not knowing about settlement history within the Church. Geoff cries and walks out of the show.

Links:

1. Why the LDS Church tops Facebook page rankings
2. Religious belief is human nature, study finds
3. Come to the new singles ward opening up! FLETCHER!
4. KJV finds niche within the Church
5. 400 years of KJV!
6. BYU rugby in championship
7. Vandals in Denver!
8. The hose have got to go!
9. Different strains of Mormonism
10. Recap on Beyond BYU event
11. Find Geoff’s fan page on FB

This Can Be Our Future If We'll Only Just Embrace It!

- Download "This Week in Mormons" Podcast MP3

Scott Anderson: A Living Legend

Moscow is getting a stake! Moskva! Good for Russia! And we talk some other Church statistics over from 2000-2010.

Peter Vidmar, noted Olympian and recently-appointed Chief of Mission for the US Olympic team has resigned due to pressure from those against his stance on Califronia’s Prop 8. Jacked up.

How “Mormon” is Jon Huntsman? The mystery continues.

A journalist says that Mormons will be “expected” to vote for Mitt Romney by their church. Uh…

In other bits – Marie Osmond re-re-marries, Book of Mormon on Broadway gets a gagillion Tony nominations, FHE treats are the way forward, the Hummer Mom gets in trouble!, and balloons rise in Phoenix! Balloons!

—and more!

Clicking:

1. President Monson speaks at Dixie
2. Moscow stake!
3. Other Church stats
4. Peter Vidmar departs
5. Tony nods for BoM
6. Lessons through FHE treats!
7. Silly kids and flash mobs
8. Hummer mom
9. Balloons for Peace
10. Romney farce
11. Huntmsan – great Mormon or greatest Mormon?
12. Bridal things are changing!

- Download "This Week in Mormons" Podcast MP3

A slew of stuff this week!

Conservative LDS folk find themselves at odds with the Church over Utah’s HB 116. Welcome to the other side, folks. Liberal LDS people are amused… and adorable Salvadorian branch presidents are deported.

Propaganda art is pulled from the BYU Bookstore by the artist. Apparently he does not approve of BYU’s political neutrality.

Phoenix hates righteousness. They don’t want a temple and they loathe white lightpoles. Yes, lightpoles.

The Mormon Times explains to us how to use iTunes.

The Atlanta, Georgia Temple is finally rededicated following an extensive renovation.

MTC curriculum is reported to be changing.

Oh yeah, and bin Laden is dead.

Links:

1. Phoenix hates righteousness
2. Atlanta Temple rededicated
3. Church’s second solar-powered meetinghouse
4. Elder Holland visits the Persian Gulf
5. Immigration:
   1. Conservative members on the outs
   2. LDS Newsroom statement
   3. Branch president deported?
6. The spirit of Reagan will not live in BYU’s Bookstore!
7. U of U president Michael Young gets hate from the godless Pacific Northwest
8. How to use iTunes according to the Mormon Times
9. MTC curriculum changing?

It just gets better and better!

Definitely Non-Partisan

- Download "This Week in Mormons" Podcast MP3

If we cease to exist next week because of the piles of lawsuits that will inevitably come our way because of Al’s remarks on this episode, it’s been a good ride. Thanks, folks! Much love!

Continued analysis on why men in the Church fail to marry. Hint: It’s the women’s fault.

Are missionaries going to cease tracting? What??

BYUSA brings us their own unwitting version of Hotornot.com entitled YFashion. It’s amazing. And by amazing we mean awful. And by awful we mean awesome.

Some Utahans have ceased to pay tithing because of the Church’s approval of the Utah Compact involving immigration. No Church PAC, folks!

Missionaries are out of Ivory Coast. Period.

Aspiring filmmaker seeks to make Duck Beach documentary! Yes!

BASE jumping off of the Church Office Building. Revealed!

And “McKay Coppins” is “addicted” to “pornography.”

Click:

1. Our lovely smiling guy gets no love
2. Tracting. Yes or no?
3. Goodbye, Cote d’Ivoire
4. YFashion is AMAZING
5. Mormons MBAs get together and look down on everyone else
6. Oh McKay…
7. No marriage!
   1. Men are wimps
   2. Women do not entice!
8. No LDS PAC
9. Restoration of Joseph Smith home in Susquehanna

Fashion Forward

- Download "This Week in Mormons" Podcast MP3

Is there a more misunderstood, maligned group than those at TWiM?

Student wards are done! No more! Just YSA wards from here on out. Have fun with that, BYU. There are pros and cons to this, which we discuss on the show.

Inflation has finally hit the Church’s storehouse. Prices are up. It was inevitable.

Cottonwood Heights is got some flava!

Church Public Affairs director Michael Otterson has some words about “The Book of Mormon” musical.

Also, the return of “Worthless Stories Out of the Mormon Times.” The Mormon Times can help you start a blog, Mormons are apparently the most misunderstood religious group ever, and BYU’s Honor Code allegedly targets blacks. Goodie.

Links:

1. Rising cocoa prices will ruin us
2. Farewell, student wards
3. Go, Otterson, Go!
4. Murals are sexy!
5. BYU sponsoring Seder meals
6. Honor Code targets blacks
7. No one understands Mormons
8. Learn to start a blog! It’s easy! It’s fun! It’s for everyone!
9. 150 million copies of the Book of Mormon printed

Profound Scientific Analysis

- Download "This Week in Mormons" Podcast MP3

Post-Conference post-mortem on dating and the like. It never ends. Chumps.

Terrific statistical data about Church growth across a wide range of criteria. This really is fascinating stuff.

On that same note, a BYU feller creates an impressively functional database of all General Conference talks since the Church began keeping records.

Dating. Al hates it. Geoff loves it. Geoff also loves women, whom Al thinks are dainty little flowers.

The Hymns are not exclusively LDS. Who knew????

KLINGONS!

Links:

1. Statistical report
2. Stat spreadsheet
3. Corpus of GC talks
4. Kevin Barney: Pansy
5. Derek – “Let the women do it for me”
6. Other faith’s hymns in OUR hymnal. WHAT????
7. Susan Brock sentenced

Pansy.

- Download "This Week in Mormons" Podcast MP3

General Conference recap! What a great Conference it was. We’ll share our thoughts and insights about the joys to be had.

Other than that, just some assorted news, specifically that BYU is building some sort of cult compound on 900 E.

Reasons behind the Provo Tabernacle fire confirmed.

Our take on “The Book of Mormon” musical. You’ll be surprised. Seriously.

Quotage:

1. New BYU Stake Center
2. Portable temples?
3. Church sues Albany. Albany stinks!
4. Updates on City Creek development
5. Worst day of contacting, ever
6. Three new temples
7. Provo Tabernacle

Setup and Punchline

Someone's Been Busy During Breaks From Shooting

Taken With A Lone-Legged Tripod

- Download "This Week in Mormons" Podcast MP3

Religion is dying in a number of countries, studies say.

Mark Zuckerberg speaks to a half-filled Marriott Center at BYU. The Zuck was with Orrin Hatch, talking about technology, innovation, and entrepreneurship. Details on the show.

An over-zealous BYU student decides that leggings are not pants, and that they will ruin your life and make you look terrible. He is a fiend.

Updates on temple construction worldwide!

The LDSTech Conference is filled up! Get there, people!

And online missionaries make us happy. So very, very happy.

Links:

1. Religion goes by-by
2. Moroni adorns KC Temple
3. Yet another stupid Mormon Times article about Conference food
4. LDSTech Conference
5. Way to Facebook, missionaries!
6. Mormons in Baseball
7. Will Swenson directs a special film
8. Zuckerberg at BYU
9. Leggings actually are pants
10. Congrats to Janna Mcferson’s FHE Book getting picked up by Deseret Book! BUY IT!

- Download "This Week in Mormons" Podcast MP3

Blah blah blah. Jimmer. March Madness. Blah blah blah.

The .xxx domain name finally gets approval from ICANN after the Bush administration effectively blocked the motion for years. Family groups are up in arms, but is this really a bad thing?

Updates on missionaries in Japan, the Church’s involvement in Japan, and Lovers in Japan.

An innocent, humble BYU student gets fired for blurting out an expletive while at work. Listen here to hear the story.

The Shakers were once many, but are now just three. THREE!

Richard B. Wirthlin, former head pollster for Reagan, Seventy, and brother of Joseph B. Wirthlin, passes away at age 80.

We were tired of not having a reason to love McKay Coppins, so we created one for ourselves. Find out how.

Links:

1. Richard Wirthlin passes
2. .xxx domain name approve
3. Shakers!
4. Jesus Fish Chocolates!
5. Current evidence suggests God has a wife
6. Japan
   1. Home teaching aids the effort
   2. Missionaries in Sendai sent home early
7. Fired for swearing
8. Follow McKay Coppins on Twitter

SERIOUSLY??????

- Download "This Week in Mormons" Podcast MP3

Some updates on Church efforts in Japan following the earthquake/tsunami/nuclear explosions, etc.

The Dalai Lama is retiring, at least politically-speaking. What does this have to do with the Mormon world?  Everything!

Trey Parker and Matt Stone, creators of “South Park” and the new musical, “The Book of Mormon,” made an appearance on “The Daily Show” to promote their new musical. It was pretty interesting, mostly due to Jon Stewart’s over-the-top enthusiasm for the whole thing. Should your TWiM hosts go and see it?

Bring back the beard! A blog devoted to bringing beards back to the Church.

Geoff rants against LDS Tech. In fact, it seems he hates LDS Tech. Why the love for Apple? Where’s the Android love? What did we do to deserve this??

Also, Al calls himself a “technophobe”

…

Mormon Stories is a great podcast. Check it out. We discuss this past week’s show, which dealt with some pretty heady stuff. We won’t even write it on here, but listen in. It was actually the base of one of the more serious discussions we’ve had on TWiM. We know, right? TWiM? Serious???

Al makes a doof of himself in front of Harry Reid.

…Other assorted joys.

Clicking these is hardcore. You are bi-winning:

1. Newsroom updates on tsunami stuff
2. Goodbye, Dalai Lama
3. Free Tibet!
4. Mormon Stories podcast
5. Bring back the beard!
6. Mormons and beards in The Atlantic
7. Church breaks a Guinness record
8. Lindy Hill is evil
9. Look at the hard data… ANDROID!

Fear the Beard

- Download "This Week in Mormons" Podcast MP3

Recap on  Daviesgate. Thanks for commenting on Geoff’s post. Keep it up! The Honor Code is certainly a thrilling topic of discussion.

Al. Geoff. Two forlorn men on a quest to find love. We will tell you what the problem is, ladies, and what you can do to fix it.

The world is ending on May 21. Take that, Aztecs.

Time Magazine has decided that having children ruins families. Wait, what?

Geoff hates “Glee,” and Daily Universe writers should be ashamed of themselves.

Utah does well in a Gallup poll gauging the Happiness Index. Poor Kentucky.

Assorted items: Phoenix temple gets parking, upcoming LDS Tech conference.

Clicking!

1. Brandon Davies was not the first BYU athlete to get the boot for getting busy
2. We must all marry Romanians
3. End of the world! (see below)
4. Families stink
5. Ruddy Glee
6. Happiness index
7. Phoenix temple parking
8. Differences between Huntsman and Romney
9. LDS Tech conference. Email us!

I’m not exactly breaking news by discussing BYU basketball star Brandon Davies’ recent dismissal from the hopeful championship squad due to a grievous Honor Code infraction. However, given the press BYU and the Honor Code are receiving, it is appropriate to discuss the ramifications of Daviesgate, as well as the current state of the Honor Code in glorious Provo.

Portions of the Honor Code date back to the days of the Brigham Young Academy, but back then it was more in an effort to ensure that the Academy’s students abided by Church doctrine. There were no grooming standards or rules for when and where someone of the opposite sex could be in one’s home. It was all about keeping the commandments. The actual, official Honor Code came about in 1940, which was originally devised to thwart academic dishonesty. Today’s Honor Code is a relic of anti-hippie (see: radical) movements in the 1960s – dress, grooming, chastity, etc.  Long hair and beards were signs of ruffians, people! One could not be expelled from BYU for Honor Code violations before this time. There was originally a difference between keeping the commandments and abiding by a separate prescribed standard of conduct. Somehow the two have now become congruous.

Brandon Davies’ ousting from his team comes at an inconvenient time for BYU, though I admire the University for standing by its principles. More props, however, go to Mr. Davies, who came to the Honor Code office on his own. All too often I have heard tales of irked roommates tattling or jilted ex-significant others seeking revenge (Tattling, by the way, is the main way the Honor Code Police find perpetrators). It took courage to go to that office, knowing fully well what it meant not just personally, but to an entire team that has been on a tear, possibly toward a national championship. Though Jimmer is apparently our new Lord Sovereign, he can’t do it alone. The fact that Davies’ infraction was also a sin – allegedly getting busy with his girlfriend – is serious, and it saddens me that this knowledge has become public, for the Honor Code office would never publicly divulge such information. It had to come from someone looking to feel important or be sensational.

I would also like to add that I don’t care about BYU basketball at all. I don’t care about college basketball. I don’t even care about college sports, except for fruity ones like lacrosse and badminton. If BYU had a decent baseball team I would have cared, but BYU baseball is only a few steps above little league.

Back to El Código de Honor.

My problem with the Honor Code is twofold: 1) The over-zealous interpretation and enforcement of it; 2) Aspects of it that are outdated, and though they do not need to be shelved, should be adjusted. I don’t mind BYU having expectations of its students. I truly don’t. One of the things I loved most about the Y was the serene spirit felt there (We’ll save a discussion on BYU’s creation of a false reality for another time. Walt Disney would be proud). It was nice. Sure, I love a good protest and some rabble rousing – and I was lucky to take part in the Todd Hendricks protests of 2006, as well as the anti-Cheney protests of 2007 – but BYU really does have a nice environment. It feels safe and pleasant (Rape Hill ((“Rape Hill” is a hill and walkway near the southeastern part of BYU’s campus. Sexual assaults were more commonplace there years ago, but security measures have largely nixed the threat.)) excluded).

The Honor Code, though, has evolved into such a crazy, nearly dystopian apparatus of the administration that rather than encourage students to make positive decisions on their own, fear-mongers them into obedience on the most unnecessary of issues, with draconian consequences for the felons. I’m not talking about not allowing drinking or premarital sex or any of that stuff. I don’t want BYU to be like every other university. There’s a reason BYU routinely tops the Princeton Review’s annual list of “Stone-cold Sober Schools.” Actual sins should be resolved through the proper ecclesiastical authority. The Honor Code office deserves to know of any violations, but it is not the governing body that guides a student toward repentance. All too often I knew people who were afraid to confess their sins because they worried the bishop would rat them out to the Honor Code Police. An understanding bishop works with an individual to get him or she through whatever torments the individual. It is not the Honor Code office’s job to see people through to repentance, and too many people miss out on the opportunity to experience the joy of true repentance because they worry their actual enrollment in the university will be on the chopping block if they come forward. Tell me, how does that teach future leaders in the Church to do the right thing and come forward? How does that help us to understand the Atonement?

What irks me most about the Honor Code is that while there are “heavy” violations and serious infractions, individuals sometimes receive probation or discipline from an administrative body for the most innocuous things: curfew violations, having someone of the opposite sex in the bathroom, scruffiness, etc. We often overlook the spirit of the Honor Code in favor of resilient, Pharisaical obedience to the letter of the law.  Allow me to relate a story that illustrates my point.

Some years ago while attending BYU, I was watching a film at the house of some girls in my ward. It was a joyous exercise in platonic socialization. When there were about two minutes left in the film, midnight came, and I was asked to leave. Now I appreciate people attempting to abide by the code which they signed. But really? Two minutes? The beauty of this is that by Honor Code standards, I could have stood just outside the doorway of this house and watched the remaining two minutes of this film (It was my DVD, too, btw). Is that really what the Lord wants us doing? If I would have done that, I would have been abiding by every precept in the written word of the Honor Code, but what of the general spirit of it? Is the spirit of the Honor Code to part ways at midnight, or is it merely to not be in someone’s house? What of those couples that, when midnight approaches, opt to go sit on the porch or in a car after midnight, so as to not break the Honor Code? Really? It happens all the time, and we lose sight of the bigger picture by scaring students into hypocritical obedience to rules they only want to abide by on paper. That is not the spirit of honor. The spirit of honor is respecting someone and opting to keep the commandments because you choose to do so, not because some bloated bureaucracy forces you to do so at the risk of losing everything. And do bear in mind I speak of non-sinful violations.

What about on the mission? Missions have rules, right? And many of them are rules but not actually rooted in commandments. They exist for our well-being and protection, and I found that keeping mission rules always benefited me. However, take, for example, a period when I was zone leader ((In LDS missions, a zone leader is a missionary responsible for the work and well-being of a number of other missionaries, representing a certain geographical chunk of a mission)). The mission rules stated that we could come in no later than 10:30 pm each night and had to be in bed by 11 pm. As zone leader, do you really think I got to bed by 11 every night? I don’t even think I was in bed by 11 most nights. I tried to be. I did everything I could. But the work comes first, and the Lord knows that. I never once read any sort of caveat or stipulation explaining that curfews and such existed, but merely as guidelines that could be bent or violated as the situation arose, especially for those in leadership positions. The Lord did not withhold blessings from me or my companion for this. My heart was in the right place, but sometimes staying up past lights-out was necessary.

Leaving someone’s house at 12:03 happens. Giving someone of the opposite sex a blessing in a bedroom with the door shut, because it is the most appropriate and pragmatic venue, happens. Being alone with someone of the opposite sex anywhere in a house happens (I know, I know. Slippery slope, right?). A well-groomed beard is more appropriate than the shaggy bro-ish hair often found around BYU’s campus. I do not advocate a removal of BYU’s important standards for its students, but it is certainly time to revisit some of the more outdated notions within the Honor Code, and to imbue a sense of personal responsibility for righteousness in BYU students through giving them choices and chances to make decisions on their own.

You might say to me, “But Geoff, the students made a choice – to sign the Honor Code and abide by its precepts.” This is true. That is a common retort to anyone who gripes about the Honor Code. It certainly is voluntary in every way. No one forced me to go to BYU, and going there was absolutely a privilege. I am forever indebted to my professors and to the members of the Church worldwide, whose tithing goes to subsidize a world-class education. But in the Church, particularly in matters of administration, we progress not because we sit there with our arms open and tell the Lord to “lay it on us.” We have to ponder and consider changes to improve a system or policy and see how the Lord feels about it.

I sincerely hope that in coming years BYU will ease up on some aspects of the Honor Code. It was supposed to be about academic honesty, not whether or not my sideburns extend a little too far past my ear (Sidenote: I never saw anyone get into trouble for violating that stipulation, yet scruffiness is akin to apostasy). There are signs of hope. Just last year the powers that be finally changed wording in the Honor Code so that simply being homosexual is not an Honor Code violation. Acting on it and failing to be chaste is, but that’s in line with Church policy. What bothers me is that before this change, the Honor Code was overreaching beyond Church policy on that issue. One could be booted from school for simply being gay or even confessing homosexual leanings. Thank heavens that is no longer the case.

True honor is learning to find balance. Too often we focus on the letter of the law in the Honor Code while ignoring the spirit of it. We sacrifice the intent of the Code so that we are kosher on paper. That is not what the Lord wants. I’m sure that’s not even what BYU actually wants. Yet that is what it has become, and something needs to be done about it. Brandon Davies, of course, is a courageous man for coming forward as he has, and BYU is admirable for not just sweeping the situation under the rug in order to secure a championship and be freely promoted. But Brandon Davies sinned. He didn’t just violate a code. Let’s work to have more perspective in the future. The Lord is pragmatic. The scriptures routinely attest to this. Just as much as God stresses obedience, he also stresses a need to be personally resilient, sensible, and thoughtful in living the gospel (And no, abiding by the Honor Code is not living the gospel). Only when we cease emulating the Sadducees will we finally understand this.

-Geoff Openshaw

- Download "This Week in Mormons" Podcast MP3

Polygamist men are less and less virile with subsequent wives, sources say. This just makes no sense. Law of diminishing returns!

Socialism in the Book of Mormon? An op-ed in the Salt Lake Trib says yes. We at TWiM are the deciders and will get to the bottom of the issue. We will make it make sense.

Early reviews of “The Book of Mormon” on Broadway are in. Allegedly, it’s a raunchy, feel-good exercise in debauchery. Not quite sure how all of that works together, but I suppose there’s a reason “American Pie” was such a box office hit in its day.

Geoff has an important question for you listeners about something important. You have to listen to the show to find out how important it is and subsequently respond with importance.

Dirty Jimmer jokes are banned from the BYU-SDSU game!

MoTab gets the most prestigious of awards.

…and The Zarahemla Times! Go Beckstrom, Go!

Rub my belly:

1. Polygamists shoot blanks
2. Union of Soviet Socialist Mormons
3. If it’s from the makers of South Park, can it really be that bad?
4. No poking!
5. General Conference dates announced. Phwew!
6. The MTC turns 50!
7. MoTab gets the Orem award

Come Back to Us

- Download "This Week in Mormons" Podcast MP3

Ken Jennings has failed humanity. The machines will kills us all.

Should we do away with the King James Version of the Bible? Is it antiquated and incorrect at this point?

An Orem woman gets swindled by a Nigerian prince British dude on LDSLinkUp to the tune of $200,000.

Might we soon see missionaries in Cuba? Sources say yes.

Latino activists urge Mexico to bar American missionaries.

The father of the 5 Browns is a schmuck.

A concert to go against porn! Yes!

Your comments and letters!

…and more stories from the Mormon Times about food and junk like that. Seriously?

Links:

1. Why the KJT is outdated
2. Why the KJT is infallible and amazing
3. Another reason not to use LDSLinkUp
4. Cuba!
5. Filthy Five Brown Jerk
6. Kill the Americans
7. Ken Jennings causes our demise
8. LDS among fastest-growing churches
9. Concerts against porn
10. Drunk dude breaks into AZ church
11. Original text of the BoM
12. Icons of Mormon food
13. Da pidgin Bible

- Download "This Week in Mormons" Podcast MP3

The Mormon Bachelor is over! Yay! Props to our friends at MoBach, though. They’ve done a great job.

Is Jimmer the greatest missionary in the world? Ever?

Elder Cook makes some interesting remarks about singles wards, namely that the “ideal way” of doing this is for them not to exist altogether?

Al desperately wants to feel a woman’s hand on him.

Lawsuits are fun. A woman sues the Church over injuries sustained during a 2005 activity.

A missionary in California saves a man from a crashed plane! Is it him? Is it In-N-Out? This is a miracle, but either way, Elder Johnson clearly wants to kill you.

The Claremont Colleges are starting a new Mormon journal. Submit your stuff today!

And Al finds out the truth behind the Brandon Flowers music video.

Clickety click

1. MoBach
   1. SL Trib article
   2. Daily Universe loves Buckman
2. Jimmer. Missionary. Deity-esque.
3. Will Huntsman and Romney hurt the church?
4. Responses to “Feel A Man’s Hand on Me.”
5. Suing the Church
6. New Mormon studies journal
7. Elder Johnson is out for blood

I Will Eat Your Children

Editors’ note: Welcome to the second round of MoBach reviews and critiques. The people at The Mormon Bachelor are delighted to curb your right to free speech. We are delighted to encourage free speech. The freer, the better. Go, team!

Sara Olds

Al: Sara, if I remember correctly, was our favorite from before.
Geoff: I think I was neutral. She was the Disneyland know-how one.

A: With this much MJ, can this even go bad?
G: Yes. But with a name like “Hype Studios,” I think all is possible.

A: Oh gees, he is soooo white. This is gonna be hilarious.
G: You get up there and make it happen, Al. Go. Show them.

A: They got the Tokyo Drift King to teach them Michael Jackson!?! Look at that hair!
G: Strong Captain EO reproduction shirt, Rick. The original design is impossible to find.

A: The pelvic thrust is the most foreign move you could try to teach a couple of Mormons … this is the saddest thing I’ve ever seen.
G: Wait until dinner…. Islands.

A: I do love this date idea though, err rather, it’s just a great idea.
G: It is. Sara looks totally different from the first date.

A: Is that Valdez behind the camera?!
G: I assume you mean the DJ himself. Sounds like it. Good job, Señor Valdez.

A: Holy smokes! The old dude has moves. “My new years resolution is to get MJ perfectly” – is that even legal? Can you even do that?
G: I love the old dude! Inspirational, man. That guy is a rock star.

A: Props to Rick for the moon walk, every 9 year olds dream.

A: An obvious lack of romance unfortunately, I think Sara is awesome, Rick is having fun, but he’s totally not jamming on her.
G: Not in the least. Like I said before, Rick was in an elevated state because of the Disneyland/Club 33 experience. He equated how cool that was to actually wanting Sara, which he doesn’t.

A: So true, you never know who you click with. Blind dates FTW! err not so much.
G: I never rule anyone out, but I also know from the outset certain things that will either let someone in the door or not. ?

G: And they drive off into ignominy…

Angie Pita

A: I picked Angie cause I recognized her from her video….

G: Apparently Angie picked up chain smoking in the interim.

A: Romantic music …. and pan to Dave & Busters.
G: Very romantic and classy. The place lends itself to passion.

A: Best line ever… “And let’s just say… he was engaged” bum bum BUM!!
G: A year and five months. “Dang, that’s a lot!” Rick’s story is true, and I believe that was his last girlfriend.

A: My ears are bleeding, this date is doomed.
G: I hate this conversation. And I hate hearing Angie speak.

A: Neither of these people will ever find love.
G: Al Doan, ftw.

A: Women, guys love it when you ask them “Could you see yourself in a relationship with me” on your second date, particularly if the guy is still making out with 7 other women… you can trust him.
G: My heart goes out to Rick in this situation. This whole conversation seems like it was planned by the MoBach folks, but responding to such a question is never any fun. I would just offer up a simple, “We’ve eaten Peruvian food together; spoken Spanish, and now we are wasting our life at D&B. What do you think?”

G: What was with that creepy as hell eyebrow raise/mass murderer smile thing Rick did at the end of his response? *shudders*

A: Skeeball, this date should have happened at Chuck-E Cheese, then you could have been bopping those mole poppers
G: I prefer the Deal or No Deal video game.

A: This date is a long interview… make it stop.

A: 5 minutes of talking to the camera; Oprah can’t even pull this off.
G: I seriously want to strangle her.

G: Best line of the night. From Angie: “We’re both not here to play games…” and then the camera proceeds to show a shot of the games around D&B. Strong.

A: That was the date? D&B and home? That’s like taking a girl out for breakfast on a first date, you have no desire to pursue this.
G: This date made me angry. Most of this season of MoBach made me angry. I’m glad it’s done.

Verdict:

Al: Sara dominated this, like she just moonwalked on the grave of all the other girls. WTG Sara.

Geoff: Considering how much Rick looks to the left while he talks, you know he is pulling most of his thoughts out of his ginger butt. Sara wins, but neither date was particularly strong.

Can we all assume this is with Jane and it’s just complicated because he’s still making out with random women?

Editors’ note: Welcome to the second round of MoBach reviews and critiques. The people at The Mormon Bachelor are delighted to curb your right to free speech. We are delighted to encourage free speech. The freer, the better. Go, team!

Jane Madsen

Geoff: Sheesh. I guess rent caps are benefiting someone, Jane. Nice abode.
Al: I think Jane is in the north of Manhattan, the rent is cheaper above 85th see

G: They liiiike each other. You can just tell.
A: LOOOOVE!

G: Times Square is kinda cliché, but Rick’s never been to NY, so who the heck cares?
A: Time square is great, it’s just a fun place to go and feel like you’re in the city. It’s not the true “New York” but it’s very busy city feeling.

G: I think this is Rick’s first time using public transit since he disavowed BART in San Francisco.
A: What’s wrong with the BART?

A: M&M hi fives… women love that.

G: This video is really nicely shot; just the depth, lighting, colors. Good job, MoBach folks.

G: Lovin the creepy Blair Witch footage atop 30 Rock. And now they are making out off camera. This is filthy.
A: There is nothing better than hearing lips slobbering off camera. This is true reality TV.

G: Holy romance, dude. The song, the slow-mo. Lens flares. Gnomeo and Juliet. It doesn’t get any better.
A: over the top? I guess it is date two, who is to say

G: Also, I love that Rick went all the way to NY to have Mexican food. Joyous irony.
A: As an aside, mexican food in NYC is pathetic. He should have just got a whole pizza for 6 bucks. Now thats NY!

G: Lincoln Center looks awesome in the rain. I would say dampness or moistness, but people regard those as dirty words.
A: Why does one go to the Lincoln Center at all, there is nothing but dampness to be had there.

G: Haha, “this opera place…” TMB has truly shown me how classy Rick is.
A: I love that the clouds clearing was such “a sign” sometimes I think we see what we want to see

G: If he doesn’t pick Jane, he is a major a**. There was so much romance and wonderment during this date that I almost cried. And I don’t cry easily. The last time was during the most recent Harry Potter film.
A: Wait are you serious? You cried during Harry Potter? I think so much less of you.

Melanie Carney

G: Ah, our Columbus lover.

G: This sure started abruptly. No intro. Is she just living with him?
A: Rick needs a woman to take care of him

G: This is friggin’ weird.
A: You don’t often cut to the shower scene within the first minute of a date?

G: Nice way to get your mack in, Rick.
A: Dude, that guy is a kissing machine, I don’t think he’s found enough lip satisfaction among all 8 women, this will be trouble when he has to pick. Dimes to donuts say he just asks all 8 women to keep making out with him.

G: Something tells me Al is enjoying this more than I am.

G: I wonder if the MoBach people realize how many times they could be sued for intellectual property violations throughout this season?
A: Pillow fighting has never been enunciated so well.

G: Joyous sacrilege.
A: Speak to me in tongues baby…

A: Raul making terrorist jokes… mmmk

A: The whole no phone call after the mission, happens all the time. I’ve seen it myself.

G: Alright, this is amusing, but basically a complete waste of time. Rick’s clearly found his fulfilling relationship with Jane so now he’s just enjoying the opportunity to jack around and be on camera. Prima donnas.
A: Melanie is not an actress, nor Ruck (Rick Bucks screen name), but gees

A: Did rick sponsor his own date … that cost nothing? He picks the one date that costs nothing to run his ad? Buyer beware, that’s all I’m sayin.

G: Since it was acting, it’s impossible to comment on any real connection. Great synopsis from Rick, though: “At the end of the date my place was a mess from so many wardrobe changes. As if I wasn’t impressed enough Melanie just started cleaning it all up and throwing all the wet clothes in the drier. Who is this girl?” She is the maternal slave you seek, good sir.
A: “One of my favorite things about girls is when they know how to socialize. On both our dates Mel made good friends with the camera people.” This proves she is a winner, Rick with criteria like this, I’m amazed you’re still single.

Verdict:

Geoff: Jane, all the way. She’s won the entire thing. And if she doesn’t, Rick, you, sir, are a villain of a man to toy with a poor girl’s emotions that much. We do not kiss romantically atop 30 Rock while Jay Z plays for no reason, mister!
Al: I agree, Jane should get the prize. Melanie does seem to be an enternaining date though. If she keeps jumping into showers with boys on dates, she’s gonna run into trouble though. – words to live by.

Editors’ note: Welcome to the second round of MoBach reviews and critiques. The people at The Mormon Bachelor are delighted to curb your right to free speech. We are delighted to encourage free speech. The freer, the better. Go, team!

Andrea Candrian

G: Before anything, can I just commend you, Al, for the “Fight!” picture this time around? Beana looks outstanding.

Al: Political looking…. what does that mean?
Geoff: It means Rick has no idea about politics. It’s not political looking. Northern Virginia looks like Orange County with more black people.

A: What’s with the church garb, is this Sunday?
G: Yep. Super Bowl Sunday, to boot.

G: Excellent usage of Def Leppard. They are easily the best glam rock band with a one-armed drummer out there.

G: Look at that joyous, excited hug. Admittedly, I thought Andrea was about 24 in the first video. I don’t know why. She’s clearly all put together and womanly in all actuality.

A: Is this woman related to Andrea?

A: If this is the mom, I think it is, this was a terrible idea for a date. Word to the wise, mother’s on dates are a bad idea. Notice how Andrea sits almost silent while the momma is eating it up. Talk about undue pressure. ugh.
G: Haha, I don’t think it’s her mom, dude, but thanks for the great tirade.

G: I would love to spin her turntable…

A: “Would you lick that off?!” Rick, Utah is calling, they’re ready for your approach to dating.
G: Bwahahahahaha!

G: I love that she asks why he didn’t kiss her. Andrea actually posted an “outtakes” video on her Facebook and while it’s clear she’s ribbing Rick for the sake of good fun, Rick has really bad answers about why he doesn’t kiss her or anything else. Ah, Buckman, we hardly knew ya.

A: hahahah “Who kisses a girl 3 times and doesn’t choose her?” – Excellent question. Bwahaha
G: I know! I love that she called him out! The dirtbag!
G: I hate football. Be advised, women.

G: I will take you to Disneyland, Andrea.

A: Ahhh nothing beats playing wedding on a date, women love that.
G: This makes me want to barf. Granted, I’m sure they hated everyone looking at them.

A: Wow this is really an 8 minute video. The cutting room floor is empty. I don’t think we’ve missed a thing.
G: Well we get no recap vid, so it’s like watching two.

A: I do love DC though. Too bad our nation’s mall is gravel and crab grass. Can we get some Obama movement for that?
G: Blame L’Enfant. Weird music choice for waltzing around DC, btw.

G: Bollard hopping, ftw.

A: I missed that, was there a kiss at the end?
G: No. Never. One has to be too young to rent a car to merit a kiss from Sir Buck.

Beana Hathaway

A: I love the mom grilling him at the beginning. A very concerned mother.
G: If Rick were picking up my daughter I’d have a shotgun in the window.

G: Why?? Bieber Fever? Is NOTHING HOLY????

A: No onions on his 3×3. How presumptuous.
G: The contrast between these two dates is awesome. Andrea had this classy day in DC while Beana has her mom and In-N-Out. Strong.

A: Oh gees, the car singing. A voice only a mother could love.
G: Do I need to share with everyone the “Final Countdown” video we made in Hawaii, Al?

A: The blades of glory esque dance routine is well played. Throw back to when me and Geoff did this to The Young MC’s “Busta Move” Epic.
G: They drove from Coronoa (I assume) to the Spectrum for ICE SKATING??? Because there aren’t any real ice rinks between the two???

A: For Californians, I expected much uglier ice skating.
G: With surfing and skateboarding in our blood, we have natural dexterity and balance.

A: Translation – Beana was lame last time, now she’s fun.
G: I think Beana is always fun. She’s Beana.

A: I can vouch for this, Beana loves sex talk. It can make for some awkward dinner moments.
G: …

A: Two things at the door, first, the classic Beana snort. Second Rick was looking for some lovin, the hand position, the lean in, but wha wha wha… shutdown.
G: Beana doesn’t mack guys she actually likes And yes, that lean-in was painful.

Verdict:

Al: Andrea. Sorry, Beana, but I no longer fear you.

Geoff: Uh, Beana! All the day! Take her! That frees up Andrea. Get in my corner, Al, sheesh.

- Download "This Week in Mormons" Podcast MP3

The grave of Zechariah has been found. Holla.

Religion is the foundation of democracy and prosperity? Clayton says yes. Also, E. Oaks speaks on religious freedom at Chapman University.

A disgruntled BYU student argues that we should stop pressuring young men to serve missions, you know, because it’s not about duty at all.

The UN has no testimony.  Find out why.

McKay Coppins resurrects, like a phoenix from the ashes!

Assorted news: Church issues a statement regarding Book of Mormon musical; awesome jokes within mormon.org chats; Zarahemla Times! Remember, comment on stuff at the ZT!

Touch me for fun

1. Zechariah.  FOUND!
2. Religious base and prosperity
3. E. Oaks’ comments at Chapman
4. How dare you expect me to serve a mission!
5. The UN hates families
6. Book of Mormon musical statement
7. Mormon.org joke
8. Stupid Jimmer
9. More McKay.  Always more McKay.

"Kaaaaahhhhhhn!"

Editors’ note: Welcome to the second round of MoBach reviews and critiques. The people at The Mormon Bachelor are delighted to curb your right to free speech. We are delighted to encourage free speech. The freer, the better. Go, team!

Samantha Goodsell

Geoff: Oh goodie! More Temper Trap! They aren’t overplayed or anything. Can’t we leave that song to “500 Days of Summer,” where it belongs?

G: I can’t help but think that her name is very James Bondgirl-esque.

G: You dirtbag. You just want to do it all for the nookie.
A: A little action? Not even a thin veil.

G: I love Rick. Chili’s. Pure class.
A: Applebees ftw. Dang you rick, you’re killing my stock in the Bees.

G: Seriously, what romantic atmosphere. If only the Dundees were being held.

G: Oh man. This guy’s “English” accent is outstanding.
A: The classic peter pan shorts and glasses. That’s believable

G: Pretty funny thing to do on a date, though.
A: Has she done this before, she seems a step behind on the blocks, which as we all know in the pirate world, means she’s dead.

G: Good thing the blinds are shut. We can’t have people knowing what goes on in there.

G: Are they rehearsing in a converted living room?
A: LOL, and second date question of the night – “Do you see a future with Rick?”

G: Must we always use the soundtrack from “Pirates of the Caribbean”? Where’s the love for “Cutthroat Island”???
A: LOL, what a climactic kiss. Video was better than most, so props for that. And I’ll agree, great date idea, especially if you find yourself with a burgundy ballet studio and some swords on your hands and nothing to do.

G: Overwrought: adj. Extremely elaborate or ornate; overdone.

Melissa Lundquist

G: My girl, Melissa! Hot, sexy, single mums!
A: Not a possibility to get some kissin in that shirt my boy, dress for success I always say.

G: I may mock salon workers/stylists, but she’s got great hair.

G: Wow. She doesn’t want to seem to dance at all.
A: Haha, she would have none of that “romantic evening” jibber jabber.

G: You gotta read the writeup, but Rick took her to Javier’s, a Mexican place of sorts. I loathe Javier’s. My old boss made us all go down there when he was in town. It’s Mexican food, people. There’s no way to justify an $18 taco. Ever. Especially in SoCal where awesome, filthy taquerias are all over the place. Sorry, I just really hate Javier’s. In fact, read my review on Yelp!

G: This was shot on an iPhone, wasn’t it?
A: Obviously, thus the coloring that makes Rick look like a beet and her look like she’s buried in makeup. Thank that apple.

A: Hymns on the Piano… this normally works.

G: Rick totally wanted some lovin’ but she wasn’t budgin’.
A: “The personality of our relationship should be more physical…. my dad taught me that…. so uh… Melissa?”

A: Oh that shirt.

A: Also, I wonder how the child comes into play, is Rick down to be a dad right out the gate? Where are these questions people!?

Verdict:

Geoff: Hard to say. I think Sam stands a better chance (Rick stood up for her amidst all of the scrutiny after their first date), as they seem to click better, but I just like Melissa more; probably because she’s not six.

Al: Melissa, because I feel like Samantha is gaming the system. Melissa FTW

Editors’ note: For the next few weeks we’ll be critiquing dates on “The Mormon Bachelor.” The folks at MoBach heavily moderate their comments so that everything involves sunshine and rainbows, and we think that is dumb. This is dating, people! Not all of it works or is positive, and we shall address it as such. Your comments and thoughts – uncensored and unedited – are welcome, as always.

Samantha Andreasen

Geoff: I felt like they actually had Rick mic’d last time around. Guess that was a fluke.
Al: I like the sounds of the street.

G: Giving roses to the Bachelor, eh? Ballsy. I don’t suppose we’ll see an actual rose ceremony this time around, either. You have no idea how irked I was that I went to the “rose ceremony” party for the Bachelorette only to have nothing transpire.
A: Very ballsy, but roses and demands like “I want this back” always work out well.

G: Al, she’s from Cleveland. You love your Midwestern girls.
A: I’m against the sunglasses on my head while it’s dark out look. Makes you look… well a bit tacky. Midwest or not. And I do love me some midwest women.

G: Eh, the Kings. Sorry, Ducks fan here. And by fan, I mean someone who lives in the vicinity of the team and, therefore, pretends to care about hockey.
A: I love the date though, hockey games are awesome, and it’s won me hearts and destroyed potential relationships, these are amazing nights.

G: There’s nothing like hitting up Ralph’s (a Kroger grocery store for you out of market viewers) for dinner.

G: Dude! Great seats! She really does have the hookup.
A: Good work here! This girl is growing on me

G: Oh no she didn’t! Kiss cam! This girl wants it bad.
A: Awesome!! I’ve always wanted that to happen on a first date, how funny man! Kiss cam FTW!

G: Kiss fest! Forgive my French, but I think they were both just horny that night.
A: This never happens.

G: Love the recap video. By Rick’s logic, the more kisses he gets, the better the chance there is for a second date. Ergo. Sensual favors = advancement in the workplace. Sexual harassment!
Al: Sensual favors. Bwahahahha

Melanie Carney

G: Our last victim. We’ve come so far!
A: The beach is your favorite place on earth? They are nice, but it’s very sandy there. Sand is everywhere.

G: Hey Melanie, I live in DC, which is not 2000 miles from Buckeye land. I’m just sayin…
A: Hi Melanie, I happen to be through Columbus every now and then. No need to travel.

G: Speaking of Columbus – Al, she’s got to know one of your favorite YSA residents of Columbus. I think you and Rick need to tag team this one.
A: The CTR shirt is entertaining, I love that the camera girl laughed (Elton?)

A: This is a pretty sweet chick me thinks. Way to represent the midwest.

G: Awesome date idea. Anything to mess with Walmart is good in my book. She scores big points for creativity.
A: Dude, you see the booty slip rick was going for on the chair. That hand didn’t need to be there

G: I’m pretty sure that’s Janna McFerson we can hear laughing as the camera person.
A: Ahhh, yes

G: I bet these pictures are going to turn out wonderfully, given the terrific lighting on the pier.
A: LOVE this date. That is actually really funny

G: I believe that technically they now have to buy all of those frames.
A: False.

G: Come on Rick! Mack her!
A: Hahhaha, he was totally wanting some lovin, bwahaha, way to be strong Melanie, way to be strong!

G: Good recap video. She seems like a sweetheart. Solid connection between the two, but will the distance ruin it? Decisions!
A: I got dibs if he doesn’t choose her.

Verdict:

Geoff: Well this is hard! Do we take the saucy minx from Cleveland or the feisty, clever one from Columbus? The battle for Ohio is not an easy one, but since Columbus is the capital of Ohio and also has a temple, it shall defeat sad Cleveland, which has nothing more than the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame and a city that is steadily losing population every year and manages to set Major League Baseball records for lowest regular-season attendance per game. Poor Indians.

Also, I just like Melanie better, even if I hate the name. (Here’s to you, sis!)

Al: Melanie for sure. Love them midwest women. Geoff has no appreciation for fine things that aren’t a coast. Despite the fact that Sam(antha) chose my favorite date move of hockey, I still have to crown Melanie. What a run baby

Editors’ note: For the next few weeks we’ll be critiquing dates on “The Mormon Bachelor.” The folks at MoBach heavily moderate their comments so that everything involves sunshine and rainbows, and we think that is dumb. This is dating, people! Not all of it works or is positive, and we shall address it as such. Your comments and thoughts – uncensored and unedited – are welcome, as always.

Tina Brummitt

Al: Tina has a huge knife, and she’s attending a prom of some sort. I’ve seen this movie, it didn’t end well.
Geoff: Seriously, she scares me.

A: I didn’t recognize you from you application video?
G: I wonder if this girl knows Aubrey or Erin. Otherwise, using their home for the date would be super awkward.

A: First time to California, something tells me this was a high point in the conversation.
G: You know we Californians love to show newbies the glories of our homeland.

G: This poor girl’s expe